PLEASE help me out. boyfriend problem, any serious feedback is appreciated.

Question

my boyfriend (of ten months) left his phone at a restaurant the other night so i went to pick it up for him while he was working. I looked through it to make sure no was was messing with it and came across a message that he sent to a girl asking her if she "wants to go out to dinner to catch up"

could it really just be an innocent dinner out with her?

he doesn't tell me things unless he knows for sure, so i'm not positive that he's even trying to hide it but it's been driving me nuts.

we have been dating for 10 months and he's never pulled anything like this, and never cheated on me, i know this for a fact.

how can i approach the situation? PLEASE help me, i don't know if it will p**s him off or not, or how to even say it?

Answer 1

well for u to say that u were lookin thru it to make sure no one was messing around ... is pure BullS h i t ... becuz as a female, i know it was just a natural instinct to chekk thru his fone

regardless: a) if u tell him that u were going thru his fone and found something, he may get mad at u and wont trust u with him and his stuff again and might even feel offended that u dont trust him

b) even if u ask him about the text msg, he'll turn it around and blame u for not trusting him and going thru his fone

so uve pretty much landed urself in a lose lose situation

however, the text msg might bug u for the rest of ur relationship and leave u feeling very hostile so u might as well just confront him and ask him who the girl is and where theyre going and what they have to 'catch up' on

just say that u have no problem with it, buh u wud just appreciate being in the know how of what is going on especially regarding other females, cuz im sure if u asked another guy out to dinner to 'catch up', he wud appreciate knowing as well

so yeh gluck buh either way, lose-lose situation

Answer 2

Tell him directly that you happened to notice by accident that he was in touch with someone to have lunch and see how he reacts.  If he gets really angry it's a  "gotchta", and he is messing around behind your back.  If he reacts calmly, it's problably just a friend thing. But , don't let this fester. Get it out in the open now or it will only get worse. good luck  

Answer 3

just ask him r u cheating on me lol thats all if he realy loves u he wouldnt do that  

Answer 4

i think it's just a innocent dinner, but u should say something like 'i can't belive we've been together for soo long....ur perfect...or something like that. it'll make him feel guilty if he is cheating on u.  

Answer 5

A relationship is nothing without honesty, so have an honest talk with your boyfriend. Explain that you were just checking his phone to make sure no one had messed with it and came across the message. It sounds as if he's catching up with an old friend, so I'm sure it's nothing, but talk to him anyway.

Good luck x*x

Answer 6

dont assume too much - it sounds like an innocent dinner.

my best idea is:

if he mentions it (which he better! if he doesnt, it may be a problem.), say you'd love to come along and meet her. I think you'll be able to know by the way he responds.

he sounds like an ok guy, id just keep it cool, this doesnt sound like a big stunt.