PLEASE!!!! need advice on a whining two and a half year old?

Question

My daughter is two and a half and whines all the time. Not for anything in particular - it is driving me crazy and I really feel like I am heading for a nervous breakdown. I have tried ignoring her, giving her attention, giving her what she wants and really do not know how much longer I can take this. Any advice on how to help her stop or for me to handle it better would really be appreciated. It has only been like this in the last couple of weeks and there have been no major changes in our lives that would upset her. Her dad is away alot on business and this might have something to do with it as I am sure she misses him. thanks

Answer 1

I would just look at her in the eye and tell her --- "I can't understand what you say when you talk like that." Reward her by paying close attention to what she says only when she doesn't whine.

Answer 2

When she starts whining, tell her that you only understand "big girl" words. Don't answer her questions or grant her requests when asked in the whiny voice. If it continues, set her on her bed and tell her she can come out after she "throws away" the whining.

Answer 3

I'm afraid your daughter is at that age when they do start to whine. My son is now 4 and he's still whining but not so much and not so often. He was a whiny baby and when he got to two he was a nightmare. What I did was to try to take him out of the house as often as possible and to play with himas often as I could. Try to distract her when she whines by singing a song or shouting something like "oh look, I just saw a spider" and if she keeps whining you say to her. Mummy can't listen to that whining voice. I will only listen if you speak in a nice voice" Good luck. It does get better

Answer 4

First, never ever give in to her whining. This will only encourage her to do it more. Ignoring her will only make her whine louder to get your attention. You need some tough love in this case or she will continue to whine (my cousin is 13 and still whines to her "Mommy." It's truly horrific).

You need to explain to her in a firm tone why she should not be whining (who cares if she's only two? They understand more than we give them credit for). If she continues to whine, send her to her room or somewhere you can not hear her if she starts to throw a tantrum. After 10-15 minutes, retrieve her from her room and again explain to her why she was sent there.

Continue this process as often as needed. It will take time, but she will soon realize that not whining is better than being sent to her room all the time. Good luck!

Answer 5

Welcome to the world of the terrible twos........threes............fours........

My son is 5 and my gosh, can whinge for england!, and trust me the older they get the worse it gets!

I've introduced an awards scheime, the less he whinges, the more ticks he gets, therefore he may get a treat at the end of the week!

Your little girl maybe craving attention - not from you but from her daddy, and because your 'mummy' you get the brunt of it. make sure he calls her every day and reminds her to be good for mummy!

Be firm with her, as hard as it is, as well as giving her lots of love and fun times!

Good luck!

Answer 6

i went through the same ordeal with my 4 year old. it is called the terrible two syndrome.you see, they have a lot of energy and are bored, so they whine and bother you. this is what i did with my son. you can also try these. i used to take him to park every afternoon. he ran and played and came home tired and sleepy. also i put him to school. so he got up early in the morning and went to school everyday. after coming from school he had his lunch and took a nap. then sometimes in the afternoon i took him to mac donalds. he played there in the ball room for hours. also i fed him round the clock. so he wasnot hungry. children whine when they are hungry.also when i was indoors i gave him crayons to play with.

Answer 7

She is old enough to understand English, so sit her down and tell her you love her very much, and then tell her the whining has to STOP!!   Tell her whining will get her punished from now on, and then STICK TO IT ! ! !  If you punish with ttime out, do it when she starts the whining bit, and then leave the room.  The emptier the room, the better.When she figureas out that whining gets her nothing but stuck in an empty room, she'll stop !

Answer 8

it must be so awful for you, as yousaid her dad is away a lot,

  i know when my son is away and he is a lot lately then my daughter in law has an awful time with her daughter who is 6yrs she plays up very badly even going to bed she is a total night mare,fights with her brother who is 8yrs.

when it is bed time she just will not stay up in bed she gets out for a wee then for a drink then she just cries and her mum is up and down stairs all night.when her dad is home he makes sure she is behaving her self.

Answer 9

put them in front of spongebob

when a commercial comes on, they might start crying again

definately invest in earplugs

Answer 10

First, just to differentiate between what I call whining and squealing.  To me, whining is when they are talking and squealing is when they scream in high pitched tones when they are playing or frustrated.

My oldest son used to whine, and I would tell him I couldn't understand him while he was whining, and until he was ready to talk without whining.

Now, my youngest son is very energetic and noisy and squeals a lot.  We have taught him quiet voices and how to whisper and we tell him shhhh and be quiet.

If you think that this behavior may be due to your husband being away.  Then schedule a good time that she can call him each day and get her daddy fix, perferably later in the day.  This can be used as a reward.  Tell her that if she doesn't whine all day, then she gets to make her call and talk to daddy, but if she starts whining, then that privaledge is taken away. And stick to it.  If you can't call each day, then make a chart and decide how many days out of the week she has to talk without whining and when she does reach her goal, then she gets to call daddy.

Answer 11

I can totally relate.  My son is going through that too.  He whines for everything.  I am constantly telling him to stop whining.  I've been trying not to give into him or if it's something he can have then I make him ask nicely without whining and he seems to be getting the hint finally.  It's taking a while, but he seems to be doing better.  Around dinner time is normally the time he whines the most, so he's probably just hungry.  Is there a certain time your daughter does it more.  I think once she figures out you wont give her the attention she wants whiles she's whining then it will get better.  it will take a while though. Good luck!  

Answer 12

Welcome to toddlerhood!

Seriously though, I have a 23mo old and she is my first child. She started her temper tantrums EARLY at 1 year of age when she became completely mobile and it has not stopped!

She whines when I dont pick her up to carry her, she whines when I dont let her clean up after herself at dinner, if I wont let her play in the sink when I do dishes. So, you get it, she whines ALOT.

What I do that works for ME is to get down on her level, literally. I will sit on the floor with her and ask her to tell me what she wants in her inside voice and explain to her that I can't understand you when you whine. I also say it makes me sad when you whine, or things like you dont want to make me sad do you? She get it and that stops the tantrums. Not all the time but it seems to help.

I also have a "naughty chair" that I use for time outs. I put her in the chair and explain while looking her in the eye exactly why she is there and that it makes me sad and she has to stay there for two minutes. (a minute for every age)

Two year olds are learning new words every day and even thought they understand ALOT, they have trouble expressing their needs. Whining is the only way that they can get your attention!

Good luck and hope this helps!

Answer 13

Punish her when she whines and she'll stop.  My 3-year-old niece whines all of the time, and she gets sent to time-out for it.  She is getting much better.   And if she asks for something while she whines, we say "You won't get it until you stop whining.  Ask in a big-girl voice."  And she'll straighten up and ask again.  And if she doesn't, she just doesn't get what she wants until she figures out how to do it.

Your daughter is very aware of what she is doing.  She is being lazy and doesn't want to try.  Make her try.