POLL: Would you risk it?

Question

Let's say you are extremely modest in all areas but all the men in your life(even the ones you never dated) have abused you in every way possible. They don't take no for an answer and they keep persisting even taking advantage of you physically.

Then you meet a guy who've you been friends with for 4 years. When you think about how he's treated you and what he's done to and for you it makes you cry. He loves and respects you as a person and a woman. He gives you space and when you say no he leaves you alone and doesn't persist. He's the first healthy relationship you've had with a guy. You are in love with him not just for this reason.

Would you tell him how you feel or would you hold this relationship sacred and refuse to risk it afraid of losing him as a friend?

He's stuck by you at your worst while most guys would have run for the hills. No matter what you said or did to him he is unconditional to you.

So again would you risk this relationship and tell him you'd like to be more than friends eventually or hold your friendship with him sacred and don't say anything?

You guys are in your mid 20s, and single.

Answer 1

I would definitely tell him.

Answer 2

I think that the best you can do is discuss this with him. I'm sure that if he is as great as you say he is, he will understand. He may give you a chance. So I say go for it, there's nothing to lose. You may think that the friendship may be lost, but the way you describe him, I highly doubt that this is a possibility. Good luck.

Answer 3

Yep, I'd risk it.

1. I like to live my life, not avoid it.

2. if things don't work out and you drift apart, then that was what was meant to happen anyhow. stringing someone along in the hopes of "more" just leads to more of a build up to more of a let down later on.

3. seriously, why not? all your life experiences, and who you love, date make you who you are. this person could change you for the good even if they are not meant to be in it forever.

Answer 4

If you are absolutely sure that you love him more than a friend, then I would tell him - their isn't a whole risk you are taking in regards to your friendship.  If he is truely your friend then he will be ok with your feelings towards him, and if he doesn't feel the same way then he will be nice about it.

I would rather tell someone I cared for them and risk the chance of being embarrassed by their knock back, then never tell them at all and risk never having anything more than a friendship with them.

Answer 5

I think that you should discuss all of this with him. See what his opinion is. Would he want a romantic type relationship with you? Would he rather just stay friends? Either way, you are a lucky woman to know such a man.

Answer 6

i would tell him how i feel...

if he really knows me, he would understand...

it is better than living ur life wondering if it would have ever worked...

i'd go for it :)

Answer 7

Sounds like you know the answer. (yeah)