Parent and your spouse want different things, who do you obey?

Question

Parent and your spouse want different things, who do you obey?

Answer 1

Dump him he is no good for you

;o)

Answer 2

If you're old enough to have a spouse, why would your parent have any more than courtesy input?

Answer 3

Obey?? We talk things out,,,, come to some sort of compromise,,,if we can't then guess what?? My wife comes fist,,,, My parents are deceased,,,,and I get along just fine with Her parents,,,, OBEY??? I hate that word,,,,,,  

Answer 4

I don't have a spouse, so parent

Answer 5

NEVER,put yourself in between your spouse and his mother. Most men choose their mothers. But only if they are close, otherwise they will choose you. A smart man will choose his wife.  

Answer 6

As a family who lives together in one roof or even not. Should have proper communications. If this will never be possible life can be such awfully a draining one. As we can mainly accommodate proper understanding with some amount of communications.

Just like what is happenning to mostly horrible partings or even murder cases within the family. Mostly lack of proper communications.

Usually when we marry. We have already entirely getting ourselves building our own life with our new cherished family. We have our parents as our supporting guardians to build the strength and unity within our family. In case when our spouses have different views with our parents. This may need proper yet peaceful discussions to enlight both sides and weigh things better. If a spouse is stubborn. Situations need not bend too fast. Same as otherwise. If parents were stubborn too with what they will for. This may  be mostly remedied gradually patiently but with some efforts to make eachone understand for the well being of the family. We will need a lot of understanding and little sacrifices to mediate between our dear loved ones. Until they get to finally be aware of what should be really better in a particular situation.

Yet yes, When a woman wants to get in good terms with her inlaws. It will be advisable enough. That a wife's flexibility can be rendered for the good relationship with eachother. Women's natural being ability of handling relationships may be challenged. But for the happiness of all our loved ones is our main goal in our hearts. The family that stands together makes our hearts happier and free..

Answer 7

My Imam.  

Answer 8

I do not "obey" anyone, because they do not have power over me.

As an adult, I think for myself and am independent from relying on others to make my decisions for me.

My spouse and I are partners, and any big decisions we make for our lives together are mutually discussed and decided upon together.

As an adult... I love my parents and respect them, but I am old and wise enough to see their flaws. I will listen to their opinions, but when it comes down to it, I do what is right for me, regardless of their wishes. They are not in the position to issue commands towards me, and they know better.

Answer 9

The Bible says that the man and woman who marry are to become one. (Gen. 2:24)

24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.

Saving vows is easy! It's the becoming one that's the tough part!! If people haven't grown up and started relating to their parents as an adult to another adult and they still feel like they need to please them most of the time (usually because of insecurity) then their marriage is going to have some MAJOR problems!

Should people abandon their parents? Not according to scripture. Jesus rebuked some religious teachers for not honoring their parents (Matt. 15). But honoring your parents as adults doesn't equal obeying them. It can be wise to listen and consider their advice but when you're married, your loyalty is to be with your spouse first and foremost. We can still love and respect our parents but when married our place is with our spouse.

People who don't leave their parents and cleave to their spouse, really have a maturity problem and God wants them to grow up and be adults.

Answer 10

Whomever is right.

Answer 11

If you are an adult living on your own and at your own expense, you owe your complete allegiance to your spouse. This is commanded in the Bible in Genesis as well as in other places.

You can certainly take into account the reasoning behind your parents position, but that is as far as your need to think about what they want. Many parents (especially me) have the tendency to interfere in their children's adult lives because they find it hard to let go of the responsibility that they had for so many years. It simply makes us feel needed. When you marry however, you commit to that other person and they to you.

Good luck and God Bless

Answer 12

Send 'em both off to get whatever it is they want and do as you please.

Answer 13

Neither as i beat my own drum and dance when i want to as i am a single mom with no family members that are still alive.  I honor one person and that is God in heaven .

Answer 14

If I was married, I would listen and talk to both but lean towards my spouse and explain why to my parent.  When you marry, you are supposed to form your own family, not cling to your old family.  Your spouse is supposed to come first before your parents.

Answer 15

Yourself.  You and your spouse should discuss it, and make up your minds together.

Answer 16

I try to compromise, but if it's something I feel strongly about and can't reach a compromise then I must take the risk and do it my way.

Answer 17

I don't obey either of them. My wife and I have discussions and make decisions based on which options are most likely to have desirable outcomes. My parents are not involved and never will be.

Answer 18

You obey the law. Other than that you "obey" no one.

Answer 19

Obey?

Well since you live with your spouse and not your parents.....

Answer 20

Personally, I do what I think is right, but I sometimes discuss with my spouse first.

Answer 21

You and your spouse are one.  Denying them, is denying yourself.

Answer 22

I obey the sound of reason and justice.

Answer 23

Obey? What, did somebody turn the calendar back to the 19th century while I wasn't paying attention? Again? Hon, you 'obey' only you.

Answer 24

I obey no one, my husband is not that type of guy. We are total equals. I would prob AGREE with my husband as I plan on spending the rest of my life with him.

Answer 25

If I'm old enough to have a spouse I don't "obey" anyone.

Answer 26

You have vowed (if in a normal marriage) to leave your parents and cling to your husband.  At his side you can help make decisions for both of you.  

Answer 27

Just You...April...!!!

Answer 28

I obey myself.

x

Answer 29

Your spouse - that's who you have to live the rest of your life with...  

Answer 30

The bible is quite clear that once we are married our spouse is first on the priority list.

Answer 31

forgetting the flak over the word "obey", if one is married, one's spouse should come before one's parents on most matters.