Parenting problem, what should I do?

Question

Well it seems that some people are angry. Oh well. No I've never used drugs. Heck, I've never been drunk either. Honest to God. Also I've only slept with my husband. No one else before him. Anyway my situation is very difficult to deal with as I really regret getting pregnant with my twins and wish I had only gottten pregnant with one, but also not so soon. I was actually disappointed to find out that I was having twins because I knew I couldn't handle it. I have no family or friends where I live and I have no support system whatsoever. So this is more difficult than you all could ever imagine.

Answer 1

I mean if your anger issues are like they are then maybe you should just leave them with the foster mother. It seems to me like you made up your mind you don't want them back. Why put them through that? If they seem to be thriving and doing well with the foster mother leave them there. Its not a bad thing and I'm not trying to be mean. Do what you think is best for the children.

Answer 2

Why are they in foster care in the first place?? I think I either missed something or misread the ?... If you can not handle the children you have that you only see once a day for 1 hour then how in the world can you handle another baby right now? I'm not tryin to be mean but maybe you need to admit all of this to your husband and give the foster mom full rights to the children or put them up for adoption because if you are feeling this way towards the whole situation I seriously don't see it getting any better down the line. Anger issues and emotional problems are not the best things to have when you have children,it can lead to all kinds of problems in the future.

Also as for punishing them or whatever there is a fine line between disciplining the children and just plain being cruel to them...if you are only disciplining the children then I don't see why it would be an issue to correct them when they misbehave.

If you don't have patience to deal with the kids then maybe it would be a better situation if you relenquished your rights to someone who does.

Good Luck

Answer 3

i agree with the first guy

Answer 4

well I don't know your situation, but I don't really understand what you are asking? I think maybe your just trying to get reactions because you aren't really asking a question. If you can't handle the children then don't take them, let them have a good life with someone else, Do something good for them by not taking them back if you can't handle it. As for you being pregnant again, I think you should probably consider also giving that baby away, It is hard to raise a baby, twins or not, it's not easy, It can be VERY VERY frustrating, and by what your saying maybe you don't have what it takes to be a mother. At least not now maybe. So you should do best by your kids by providing them with the chance to have a beautiful life with someone else. And you should consider getting and IUD or getting you or your husband getting your tubes tied so there are no more pregnancies. I can see how people are upset at what you wrote, I am too I am just choosing not to be rude. I think maybe you should talk to someone about the way you feel.

Answer 5

well, I dont know the whole story behind this so I am trying my hardest not to pass judgement, although I will admit that is nearly impossible. I dont really know what to tell you though, I dont really know what your question is.  But I will say this: you gave birth to those children, they are your responsibility, not some strangers, yours.  You have the responsibility to take care of them, to love them, to teach them, NOT to give up on them because they are a lot of work.  Of course they are a lot of work, they are babies, babies can be a lot of work, heck kids in general can be a lot of work.  Here is my advice to you, get your act together and be a good mother to those poor children, they do not purposely p**s you off, they dont know any better, all they know is that they are living with some stranger and not their parents.  If you just give up on them I guarantee you, you will regret it, and they will be emotionally damaged for life.

Answer 6

Well, I , for one, can not believe you don't want your children!! How can a mother say that?!?! You would be willing to give up your beautiful twin girls, and still have another baby?!?! I'm willing to bet that you lost your twins to drug usage. Only a crack head would be willing to give up their children b/c of a disability. You need to have this baby taken away too! I'll be praying for your unborn child. May he/she be taken away from your ungrateful *** too!!!!

Answer 7

WoW that sounds like a lot to deal with. I mean I don't want to be a downer, but you have twins who are in foster care... one on the way... and anger problems... hmm... doesn't sound like a good situation.

Answer 8

Ok first of all i think you might get the baby you are carrying AWay if you don't have your other kids..But you are the one who brought these kids into the world..you are the one who has to shelter and take care of them..Change your thinking way be more positive..your not the only one who gets very mad at their kids we all do..and yes most of the time they don't listen but you cant turn your back on them and have another woman take your place you will regret it..Relax..Breath..Get them home and go from there..you and your husband will do it together..if you don't be a mother to your kids you will regret it..

Answer 9

Look I don't know you and neither does anyone else that is answering your question. I am not here to judge you,call you out of your name or make up false allegations about you as the other childish people did. Yes you are in a very hard place right now. Always remember what don't kill you will only make you stronger. Remember the Lord never gives us to much to handle. I am a mother of 2girls(3,5) ,1boy(10mths) and even miscarried one. I will tell you that there have been very stressful days and many more to come but with Gods help I get through them and so can you. Instead of all of the negative thoughts of what your future would be like with the disability twins and the new one on the way. Think positive(happy thoughts). Children don't ask to be here in this world and us as parents have to understand that. The Lord blesses us with our children for a reason. I honestly think that you and your husband should take a brake from seeing your twins and get yourselves together first. I also believe that your pregnancy plays a big part in this. You need to calm your nerves by relaxing and bettering your home so your twins can come home one day. I beg of you please don't give up your twins. There are people that cant have children and people that miscarried like I did. Please believe me I would do anything to of had my baby and raise it and so would others. I wish you the best of luck and I hope that you get the help that you need. I also will pray that your home will be complete soon with all three of your children. May the Lord bless you and your family!!!