Parenting - sibling rivalry/fighting?

Question

Hi,

I was wondering how to deal with my daughters bickering / picking on each other? What's funny is that they are doing the same things that my sisters and I used to do: stupid things like snapping bras, t*t twisting, wedgies, wet willies, etc. I remember I hated it when my older sister did that to me (wedgies were the worst - ouch!!), but my parents never really stepped in. And I actually would do the same to my younger sister. Almost a "rite of passage" or something.

Now my daughters are doing the exact same thing to each other, and my younger daughter is complaining to me. Do I step in? let it go? Let them work it out?

I mean, I survived, but there were bumps, bruises, and not to mention gross ears, sore nipples, and ripped panties!

Suggestions?

Answer 1

This is completely normal behavior and nothing you say or do will stop it from happening. If one is getting carried away, then go talk to her and tell her she is being a bit rough and needs to watch her strength.

Answer 2

I think it is mean and disrespectful.  I would have been punished if I had acted like that to my brothers/sisters.  You should be stepping in and taking away privileges.  How are children to learn respect if they are not taught at home.  Family is sacred and no one should ever be made to "lived through it" when it can and should be stopped.  You might want to check into the dangers of some of this "harmless" actions such at "twisting" and wedgies which can leave permanent damage.

Answer 3

I have three boys, they fought like crazy when they were little boys. But thats normal I think. I would step in when I thought someone was gonna get hurt. Talking to your kids is always better than punishing. ALWAYS

Answer 4

My family would not stand for anything like this at all. We would get a stern warning and if we didn't calm it down, our butt would get whacked.

Answer 5

Have a "family meeting" with your entire family and try to figure out a system that everyone agrees with. Reward them for doing the right thing... maybe if they go a day without touching another sister they would get some candy or something. Maybe if they all went a week without touching each other they would get to go out to dinner someplace fun.

Answer 6

What is your relationship with your siblings like? Did this behavior affect it?

Here's my opinion...

My sisters did this to each other and it didn't do anything good for their relationship. They are adults now and still have a strained relationship.

I have 2 kids (11 and 14) and I only allow this when it's "play". and then I don't let it last very long. Eventually someone is going to get mad and I don't let it go that far. Also, I don't encourage bickering. Sure, they snap at each other every now and then, but I don't allow it to continue. I make them work stuff out. I tell them all the time that when push comes to shove, you only have your family. And if you alienate your family, you have no one. When they grow up and have health, $$, family issues, they need to be able to go to their siblings for support. You have to sow those seeds now.

Answer 7

idk...my family is very close and well we would argue about silly things like "why are you wearing my shirt" but my parents always told us to respect each other's space and all. i say you step in and bring them closer together. One thing that i hate (regardless of age) is seeing siblings fight immaturely just because i wasnt raised that way.  

Answer 8

Weird... this is weird.