Parents: How did you make the decision to home school?

Question

Parents: How did you make the decision to home school?

Answer 1

My older sister was home schooling her older kids for several years before My husband and I started entertaining the idea. Meanwhile we had our oldest in public school (kindergarten and first grade) My husband started making comparisons between her kids and our oldest. Especially between her third and our first. They are about the same age. The comparisons went like this: hes doing first grade work in kindergarten and there is no home work, Our kid is doing kindergarten work can't read and is doing a lot of home work, He has manners that we can't seem to get her to pick up (says yes ma'am and such with out prompting), He wants to learn she doesn't and it goes on and on. At first we just chalked up those differences to being different families.

We had moved to a new area because of Hurricane Katrina. She was in a new school and acting out a lot more than normal. We toughed it out that year with the nightly sessions out pull my hair out while reteaching the lessons she didn't learn during the day. Grueling 4 hours (not exaggerating) worth of homework. For some reason here they think its OK to send home a lesson plan with work in every subject for home work. By lesson plan I mean I got a calender of what was to be done each night for a week. Every week. The teacher even sent home work for the thanksgiving and Christmas holidays (not color sheets HOMEWORK).

We found a new residence later that school year and transferred her to the new school for the next year. She had to redo second grade because she was not mature enough for third grade (crying about writing assignments in class and such). So off to a new school and more of the same. That was it by Christmas she and my son who had started preK were OUT! The preK teacher wanted my 4 yo on ADHD meds (he's about a year behind mentally due to health problems suffered as a baby)  and my daughter was being bullied and nothing was being done about it. My husband and I started talking about home school seriously for the first time and since we both thought it can't hurt to try we decided to give it a shot. My kids loved it and so did we! This year our oldest in in Third grade and my middle is in Kindergarten. Our baby is 19 months so we just read too and play with her.

Answer 2

We started because of my son's autism and the difficulties with the system.   I pulled all 3 of our kids and decided to give this home school "thing" a try.  *grin*

We all loved it!   I had no idea I would like it so much.   I thought I would be stressed out constantly and doing it just for the kids but I'm a lot more relaxed now too.

Answer 3

I know that my parents chose to homeschool when they went to check out the local public school kindergarten for my older brother (who was their first). The teacher did not even speak proper English and the playground was covered in broken glass and needles from drug sales. They decided it would be safer and more educational to homeschool and they never quit, I have 7 and 1/2 siblings and they are still going strong.

Answer 4

My first thoughts of homeschooling were when I was teaching. It was like a lightbulb went on and I could see what was really happening. The whole social dynamics bothered me. That the kids needed their parents more was evident. That the kids were limited in their social growth because of being lumped together by age was extremely evident. I was teaching at that time a gr. 3/4 mixed class and next to us was a gr. 2/3 mixed class. The 3's had all been together in a single gr. 2 class the previous year. By the end of the school year, the gr. 3's in my class, outnumbered by the gr. 4's, were far more mature than the gr. 3's in the other class, who were outnumbered by the gr. 2's. It really hit home just how much the primary social models make such a huge difference on a child's behaviour, attitude, outlook, way of thinking...

By the time our daughter was 6 months old, my dh had had sufficient experience teaching in a local jr. high--supposedly a good jr. high--that he was able to say that if things continued that way, he did not want her in school. He said that the kids were typically far more interested in socializing than in their school work and the girls in particular were very focused on impressing with their clothes. The style that year was "S****y" and the style in one hallway (they had their lockers according to grade in different hallways) was so bad that it had been nicknamed The Red Light Hallway. Although girls' clothing has improved a bit, their focus on socializing, cliques, being snitty, impressing boys and more has not improved any. And a good number of the boys... Let's just say that one of them lit a girl's hair on fire by spraying Axe deodorant and lighting it up. They usually just stuck to spraying it on their arms. Now the latest thing is to think they're high on Advil, for pete's sake.

Back to how we decided... The social aspects of the schools here were a huge factor. The idea cemented even more when we saw how advanced our dd was--did 99% of things earlier than expected, HUGE vocabulary at 18 months, started reading and doing some arithmetic at age 3... We hadn't even considered the academic aspect of school and what would be best for her. Seeing her do all that early, it was clear that kindergarten would be boring and even gr. 1 wouldn't really offer her much new. We wanted her to be educated in a way that worked with her pace, not the school's.

And that pretty much decided it. Over the years, we have read more, saw more, reflected more and realized that there are so many other reasons to homeschool and keep homeschooling.  But the social and academic aspects were what had us make the decision to do it. And we have no regrets whatsoever.

Answer 5

Well... that is a long story and I'm quite certain everyone's story will be different.

Our son started in a very small private Christian school (10 or 15 to 1 student / teacher ratio).

We bought into the misconception that "ooooh, to have a complete and well rounded life and not be a social misfit one must attend public school..."  

(We learned  a  painful lesson on how wrong that myth is!)

So, we made the fateful decision to start public school... the first year was great because we had one of those extraordinary teachers ... after that things just went down hill.

My son was coming home emotionally exhausted from living for 7 hours a day in a culture of low expectations, teasing (even from teachers) , negative peer pressure and so on...

He went from being very outgoing and confident to withdrawn and unsure ...

Now, we had been thinking about homeschooling for a while... so, we talked to folks about it and even asked the dreaded "what about socialization question."  Politey, I might add.

Looking back... I can now see the "oh brother not again" look on their faces... but, our questions were answered thoughtfully and truthfully.  So now when I hear these questions (when they seem legit and not just bait), I inwardly say "oh brother not again" and proceed to answer to the best of my ability.

We considered what we knew from experience about public school and what we knew about private school and what we believed we could accomplish ourselves.

We contacted several families from a local support group and started asking questions (we were even invited to dinner), went to a book fair, asked questions online...

The first family we contacted was a former co-worker - a teacher at the local school who homeschooled his kids.

We spoke to our family physician about it.  We talked to a child psychologist about it. We talked to family.  We talked to each other.

We considered it to be a huge and life changing decision.

By the end of this process of teaching ourselves about homeschooling and clearing away the web of lies we knew it was the right choice.

Sorry for writing a book...

***UPDATE...

I was thinking about this early this morning.

What it really came down to was following our hearts... we just felt that it was the right decision.

Answer 6

Our bright, vivacious child was floundering in public school and the schools response was to continue to push ever increasing dosages and varieties of drugs down her throat. She never learned to read or do basic math, her growth was permanently stunted and her confidence was destroyed. We were working hard at home to help her keep up with her lessons, but the school continued to suggest the problem was with us or our child. Still, they never held her back a grade. By third grade we'd had enough. The first week of that school year her teacher walked her out to my car, in tears and told me point blank, "I can't do anything with this child". We fought for an IEP. But, by November there was no improvement. We brought her home and I wish we'd have done this from the start.

Answer 7

After five years in school, I got sick of fighting constantly. I didn't like the way they treated my disabled children. i didn't like the way they treated my typical children. I especially didn't like the way they couldn't education any of my kids to their full potential.

I was tired of the bullying that slipped through our 'Zero Tolerance' school because there's no way 2 teachers can watch 90 kids on the playground. I didn't like the values. I didn't like the might makes right attitude. I didn't like having MY life dictated by the school....you have to do this meeting about phonics, you have to spend saturday doing that project, etc etc.

But most of it was I just like my kids and wanted to be around them. They have the right to learn the way they want

Answer 8

The reasons will be many, and the reasons to continue to HS will come in abundance.

We decided to HS before we had kids. At first it was just for the matter of us not wanting our 5 year old baby going off to be with strangers I did not know all day long. We had thought that at some point the kids would be old enough that they would go to public school.

Then we had our daughter. She could read at the age of 3, and has master all of what she would be taught in Kindergarten; which she is not old enough for until Sept 2009! She goes to preschool 2 days a week for fun and we can see the VAST difference between her and any other child in that building, even the ones that are going to go to kindergarten this coming year. She just would not fit into the public school system at this point. We have even had to have discussions with her teacher because of comments the TEACHER has made in her presence...."That girl just freaks me out" said to another teacher, while I was picking up my daughter and my DD was reading somthing to me.  I do not think the teacher meant it in a mean way, it was more of comment on how impressed she was with my daughter, but my daughter heard it and doesn't know the difference.

Answer 9

Many, many reasons.  My children learn fast.  In a class with several abilities, all cannot be met successfully.  Home education for accelerated learners is ideal.  We don't have to endlessly pore through boring material that they already know.  I can challenge them in a way an institutionalized setting cannot.

Negative socialization:  Studies are just coming out about the effects of negative socialization at school.  Of course, we all need to learn to get along with a multitude of people, but it's much easier if we have a strong sense of self, learned at home, and the maturity of being older -- to deal with it.  What is negative socialization?   A prime example is Columbine.

Less illness.  Chicken pox, lice, and a host of other ailments have never reached our home.

More opportunities.  I must admit that my family is blessed with being able to travel frequently.  Instead of reading about the Eiffel Tower, we go visit the Eiffel Tower!  I genuinely believe that children learn best by doing, not just reading about the world in a book.

Answer 10

I did not home school, but have 2 friends that did.  They were concerned about the drug and alcohol abuse in their local school district and the large class size (teacher to student ratio).  They also wanted to make sure that their children were getting a faith based education and could not afford to send their children to a church school.

Answer 11

My son's public school district "Parents as Teachers" instructor started warning me at age 2 that I'd have to think about "alternative" education for him.  She said it again at age 3 when he transitioned out of the program.

I enrolled him in 4 y.o. public preschool as a peer model.  It wasn't even a week before his teachers told me, "Do NOT put that boy in our district's Kindergarten!"  Wow, okay.  :-)  So I seriously had to start looking at non-public school options.  My son was so far advanced academically that it was apparent that no private school would work for him either.  So I [reluctantly at first] started looking into HS'ing.  Then I realized it was the best thing for him.  I was scared out of my mind!  But only after one month into it, we both loved it!

I only committed to one, maybe two years at the start.  I thought I'd just HS him "until the other kids caught up".  Well after the one year, that was apparently not going to happen.  So I said, "okay, one more year until he's 2nd grade age and the district has a gifted program".  Just as he was turning 7 and at the end of his 1st grade (by age) year, I had the school district officially test him for achievement and IQ.  After they rec'd his results they told us to continue HS'ing him.  They offered us a Gifted IEP and told us we could have whatever we wanted for support:  enrolling him in a middle school science class, setting him up with a high school honor student as a mentor, allowing him to attend chess club at the high school, etc.  We never asked for anything as we were fine on our own.

Two years ago we moved to a new state and the new district, one of the top-ten in the state, still cannot accomodate him, so we're pretty much in this for the long haul, and we're fine with that.

On the other "side of the fence", his sister has always been in public school.  It's a much better fit for her and for the entire family.  We do what is best for each child.

Answer 12

My son passed 2nd grade with a 'B' in Lang. Arts without knowing how to read.

A police officer came to speak to the parents about the dangers of kidnapping. The school had a closed in fence and there was no public access during class time.

On the gate of the kindergarten there was a poster warning parents about LSD being given to young kids and what to look for.

There was one teacher to 40 students and not a lot of learning going on.

Parental convictions.

Religious convictions.

The high cost of private schools with no assurance that the level of learning was much better.

Now,

my kids are learning,

being held accounable,

have more time to read and discover and play,

we all have better and closer relationships with each other

more considerate of others

and we're happy!

Answer 13

My aunt homeschooled my cousins, and after seeing how well they turned out, I decided to look into it.  After doing all of the research, and looking at the statistics and pros and cons, I knew homeschooling was best for my family.

Here's some info that may help you with your decision:

http://www.successful-homeschooling.com/...

Answer 14

Our decision was determined by several factors. We knew some extraordinary teachers in failing systems. "No one rises to low expectations." As we examined the socio-economic, religious-moral, academic and even physical impact of the systems our children would be exposed to, we had to seek alternatives.

My wife is Jamaican and has taught her son to read by age two, so it was a no brainer for me. I had to convince her, because home-based learned involved more than reading. We took a close look at what would happen if we did not homeschool. We looked at what things our children would be exposed to from their peers and their teachers. We thought about the values or lack thereof being given to our children and the criticism that our children would face for standing up for what we teach at home.

After much prayer and research, we honestly felt that we not only could do as well as the school systems around (both private and public), we felt that we could do a superior job. Having the facts in front of us, we felt that we would be doing our children a disservice if we did not homeschool.

It has actually helped us be more conscientious parents. It is extremely time consuming, but the rewards are astronomical.

Thanks for the question and I wish you well.