Parents I need Advice

Question

My 3.4 year old just started preschool/daycare last week. She is going Mon-Wed 8-3.

This is her second week and she tells me that she does not want to go to school because of a girl (who looks at her mean) and she just wants to stay home. I have given her advice on how to react to the girl, and I have talked to the teachers

about this girl.

She cries when I leave her, I try to stay long but I know that the longer I stay the harder that it will be for me to leave.

She has been a stay at home child for roughly 3 years, and this is a completely new atmosphere for her.

I put her in this daycare so that I could work part time but now I am thinking of finding a job where I can take her such as a family day care just because, I feel that she is not ready for 3, seven hour days.

I believe in guiding her, and teaching her and she is still a baby and so I am thinking of pulling her out of preschool and finding a part time job where I can take her or a job in which I can do from home.

What do you think I should do? Pull her out of this daycare and just put her in a preschool twice a week for 3 hours or should I keep her home (take her to play dates, and work at a family daycare with her.)

I have never dealt with this, and if I can put off school until she gits ready for kindergarten then I will, it's not like she would not be socialized because she has friends outside of school.

Answer 1

If it were me, I would put her in a preschool about 3x's a week for a few  hours.  That way she's getting used to other kids.  You said she's socialized which I believe, but once she hits Kindergarten theres no more "mommy I want to stay home."  So it would be best to get her used to it now.  I do agree that 3 straight days at 7 hours each day might be to hard on her at first.  

Answer 2

I think that schedule sounds a bit extreme. I would pull her out entirely if she were my daughter. I've never been a social butterfly and am very happy that way. I shudder to think of the extreme pain it would have caused if my parents had forced me into things like that when I was 3 or even 4.  

Answer 3

I am not sure what state you are in but in florida they go to school at 4 its pre kindergarden it is mandatory M-F for 4 hours a day.. I knew that just throwing her into real school would be hard for her so at 3 I put her in preschool and she at first was timid to join the other kids and there was that little brat bully but we stuck it through and in the end she became friends with people and the bully moved on... Its all apart of life lessons.. I was furious at first. I would tell her to point him out when we went th her school.. I wanted to give the kid exlaxe or something but I am thankfull I kept her in cause now she goes to school with all most all the kids that went to her daycare so she already has like 8 kids in her class that she was friends with from her previous school.

It is hard to stand by and watch but it will make her stronger and indipendent....Besides preschool has some fun activities like water day ( my daughters fav) different themes for the week, show and tell.... Its worth it in the end. Good Luck :o)

Answer 4

Im not a parent, but as a child I suffered from diagnosed "Separation Anxiety". My mum could not leave me at kindy without me bawling and begging her not to leave. She ended up staying with me at kindy all day every day for six months.

I have to say that shyness and social anxiety is something that has followed me a little into my adult life, and I really do wish that I had been forced into things a little more than I was, instead of being allowed to be withdrawn and constantly in my comfort zone.

So I guess I think that its important that your daughter partakes in socialisation. Really, she is three years old and she will get used to it soon enough. She is not going to have a panic attack if you leave her alone at a Day Care Centre.

Send her to day care! Im guessing that there are few children that immediately throw themselves into it with gusto and dont undergo any trauma in the process!