Parents: What would you do in this situation?

Question

Ok, say your teenager, later teens was having a birthday party, the party was a week and a half away and the plans had been set for weeks. Everything worked out perfectly and everyone they wanted to come could come.

Say your teen did something and you grounded them for 3 weeks?

Would you cancel the party?

Would you alter the party plans in any way?

Would you also not give them their presents till they were ungrounded?

What if canceling the party for a later date meant that some of their best friends wouldn't be able to make it?

If you canceled the party, what would happen on their birthday instead?

Answer 1

I would leave the party plans as they are.

Let your teen have the party with two adults present at all times, but with limits such as

not being able to leave the premise.  Remember your teen is still grounded, and should remain grounded one extra day for the permission of even having a party.

Teens are never just being teens when they

do something wrong!  

Make set hours for the party, give the gifts,

smiles and hugs.  But be steadfast in the ground rules.

Answer 2

I would let them have the party, as planned, unless they did something terrible. The grounding should remain the same before and after the party.

Answer 3

I'M GUESSING THE LABEL "SOMETHING" MEANS THAT IT IS A MISDEMEANOR YOU ARE UNWILLING TO SHARE WITH THE PUBLIC. I'M GUESSING DRUGS. PARTIES = DRUGS. ALSO, 3 WEEKS ISN'T ENOUGH FOR DRUGS.

Answer 4

I would go ahead and have the party. It is their birthday after all. A special day. I would keep them grounded up until the day of the party, and then continue the grounding the day after the party.

Answer 5

If they did something small and stupid like being late or something, then I would let them keep their party.  If it was something big then I would tell him/her they would not have the party.  The day of the party/birthday they would be ungrounded and still get their gifts from the family.  Then after their birthday and party is over, then its back to being grounded.

Answer 6

Cancel the party. You still celebrate their birthday but just family, no big gathering. Family, cake and the presents from you. Afterall you'd be wasting money if you didn't give them to her. But if you give her the party she will not learn anything. Simply delaying it also teaches her nothing.

Answer 7

What happened? What did this person do which was so terrible and bad?

Answer 8

I would follow through with the grounding, but still let the party go on as planned.  Since invitations had already gone out, and people had already responded, it wouldn't be fair to the guests to cancel.  Some people may have declined other invitations, or altered previous plans, in order to come.  

Aside from that, a birthday is a special day that only comes once a year.  And even though my child may have recently done something wrong, and is currently being punished for it, that doesn't change the fact that I love her and want to celebrate the special day that she came into our life.  So I would not withhold presents or anything else that we normally do on a birthday.  

Of course, the rest of the 3-week grounding would still stand.

Answer 9

let him have the party.. that'd be too messed up if you cancelled it unless he broke the law. If what he did is really serious, donate his gifts. If it isn't like breaking a law or something, then just don't let him open it until 2 weeks after. But canceling the party if he didnt break the law would be too much.