Parents...how would perceive this comment that was made about your child?

Question

On more than one occasion people said things to you like:

"That is a very precocious child you have there"

"Lisa is a precocious girl"

"Your daughter is one precocious teenager"

Is this a positive comment or a negative one?

Answer 1

I think it would depend on the tone used when it was said. It is a positive comment, but could be negative if said with a sarcastic tone.

One thing I've learned through having my son - is that people have very different ways of giving compliments.

I had someone tell me that Hitler would have loved my son, and that he would have made a good n**i b/c of his blonde hair and blue eyes. I took a lot of offense to that one, but the person who said it actually didn't mean any harm by it. (Even still - I think that's a VERY screwed up comment!)

I just don't think a lot of people really think about what they say before they say it.  

Answer 2

Usually it is good-- people often say it when they are surprised or impressed by the way a child behaves-- advanced for their age. A young child who speaks well and has a large vocabulary for example. I suppose in some instances it could be perceived as a negative, but I think it just depends on the context. Is the child advanced?

Answer 3

Well, if she's 13 but looks/dresses/acts like 23, they might mean it as the most positive way to say something that they mean negatively, if you know what I mean.  Kind of like when you see an ugly baby but you say "precious, dear, sweet" or anything except "beautiful."  If it was my child, I'd take it as a positive!

Answer 4

People like to make positive comments on other peoples children.  When someone doesn't have an exact thing to say they make a general comment like what a precious child, etc.

Answer 5

As you have not indicated any background I would interpret it as the girl in question dressing up or acting much older than her age and, probably in these people's opinion not very appropriately.

Answer 6

I would think people were impressed by her...I would take it as a positive comment

Answer 7

It really depends on you.

Precocious with a little one means inquisitive, smart, an eagerness to learn and know - asks a lot of questions.

I have found it's not meant as endearing when spoken about a teenager - usually means they think she is acting too big for her britches.  

Answer 8

Unfortunately, I've used that term before.  Funny it's mentioned here...

And sadly-- I used it to say that the 14 year old girl at my child's school was being a b*tch.  She tried to act like she was in her 20's and she dressed like a hooch.  I was just trying to be nice around her mom.  Other people may use it as it should be, and in the literal sense-- but if you have a 'thought' that it could be negative, re-evaluate your daughter.  If you're okay with her actions, statements, and clothing, then I suppose all is well.

Answer 9

Sounds pretty positive..

Goes further than the usual 'nice', anyway :)

Answer 10

well any time I've ever used the term or hear it used it meant that the child was beautiful, cute, loveable, etc. Certainly nothing negative

Answer 11

precocious means 1.

exceptionally early in development or occurrence <precocious puberty>

2 exhibiting mature qualities at an unusually early age <a precocious child>

so I would take it as a positive.

Answer 12

I would say it is positive.  Precocious means maturing early.

Answer 13

i'd take it as positive

Answer 14

Precocious means highly mature or advanced, so assuming the people who use the word know what it means, I would take it as a compliment.