Parents: "If someone hits you first, You Hit them Back?

Question

Whats your take on that

Answer 1

always try to avoid a fight, but if they get hit first it's a free for all. Self defense.

Answer 2

Hitting is wrong except in self defense.

I tell my kids that they can and should hit back if there is no way for them to talk to the other person -or- get away from the other person.  But, they are taught to walk away from a physical fight, if possible.  Hitting simply is not a polite or respectful way to communicate or interact with others.  And, this still holds true if the other person is not polite or respectful.  My children know that they, alone, are responsible for their own behavior.  

Answer 3

for kids ..yes ..For adults no

You have to empower your kids not allow them to become victimized

Answer 4

Never start a fight, but learn to finish it!!  

Of course, I teach my kids to try to work things out through talking and to ask help from a grown up.  But if someone hurts them, they need to stand up for themselves.

Answer 5

Like the others above me, I told my son to walk away if he can.  However, he was also taught self-defense and told to knock the other kid down hard if he was hit.  This also applied to girls who thought that they could hit just because of gender.  

As for the "white" reference above.  No one that I know tells their kid to stand there and get beat and then go tell the teacher.

Answer 6

I am going to teach my kids that they need to try and walk away from a bad situation whenever possible, but if they can't and someone hits them then they should hit them back.  

Answer 7

growing up my father taught me how to defend myself but he also taught me how to try and avoid violence. When the kids exchange blows I call it a draw and both get time outs. I tell them if one of the other kids hit you tell one of the adults, we will deal with it. Violence and fighting never resolve anything.  

Answer 8

No, you find witnesses and start a law suit.  

Answer 9

My kids have been told to walk away from it wherever possible.

And I completely support them telling a teacher what has happened... the teachers at school are there to help guide and support my kids when I am not there, and if they do not tell the teacher then neither of the kids will learn anything from the experience.

That said, my oldest had a few run in's with a bully (not just a one-off confrontation) years ago and it got to the point that against my better judgement I did tell him he should hit back. My son however decided he did not want to do that - he said he was not going to be as bad as the bully. I respect him for that.

My 12 year old recently got hit in the playground and he absolutely let this kid have it verbally but did not raise a hand to him. He other boy started crying and ran away.

Violence is not the way to go in any situation.

And to the people who say as a child it is ok to hit back, but as an adult it is not - WHAT RUBBISH! That is about as illogical as the concept that it is ok for kids to get hit my their parents but not by their peers. No wonder kids are so confused!

Answer 10

yah of course, example if someone punches you u dont just look, at them u punch them back, dont tell the teachers, the teachers are not gonna do nothin. Only white people tell there kids,to go tell the teacher is someone hits them lol. (no offense)