Parents w/teens: Do you ask?

Question

Parents, do you ask you teenager who has a cell phone, who they are texting and what they are talking about?

My mom does it all the time, she'll ask me who am I talking to and what we are talking about. Usually its a long story or an inside joke and I hate explaining.

Lately, I've been being a smart a$$, like tonight she asked me who I was texting and I replied(Im not racist either)"A black drug dealer, whos buddies are interested in a gang bang".

She got the hint but she was PISSED.

How can I get her to back off with out annoying the c**p out of her?

Im 18, 19 in 40-something days, she doesn't need to know every little bit of my life. I let her in on A LOT and I let her know the IMPORTANT things, not the personal things she DOESN'T need to know.

But

1) Do you ask?

2) How can I get her to quit putting her nose into everything?

Answer 1

no.

Answer 2

hahahahah tell her you are talking to your pimp. just kidding.

Tell her it is just a freind.

Answer 3

My mom used to because there were these guys she didn't want me to talk to. But the way I got her to back off was I was straight up with her. Sometimes I would get home from school and be like, "Mom, I texted Casey today but all we talked about was blah blah blah." I learned that if I told her more she wouldnt grab my phone as often. And sometimes if my friends send me something I think she'd enjoy or whatever then I'll show her. Just let her feel like you want to tell her everything and you will get away with leaving out some details ;)

Answer 4

Talk to her , tell her that you need your privacy because you're a teen , and tell her you are smart enough to know right from wrong .

btw I don't ask

Answer 5

Yep, it's my right as a parent to ask. You are still a minor and therefore I have responsibilities as a parent that teens think is unfair. I don't need feel the need to justify my wanting to make sure my minor children are safe. You could be talking to a pervert for all we know.

EDIT: Sorry I only just realied you already sad your not a minor. At 18, it's probably just force of habit. Now that you are an adult, you are within your rights to ask why your parents are asking.

Answer 6

well thats annoyin umm i would just say somethin like mom i promise im not texting anythinh bad if i text something you will find funny i promise i will share but until then can i have a little privacy? hope i helped !

Answer 7

My parents might ask, but it's a curiosity thing, not a nosy thing. I do the same. If I say that it's private, they're good about letting it go, but then, trust, privacy and respect are VERY big with us.

If it really bothers you when your mom asks, talk to her about it. Parents usually aren't out to ruin their kids lives, and often a good, mature (emphasis on "mature," no whining or any of  that) conversation is all that it takes to get the desired change.

If she still asks, just say, "It's private" or something with the same meaning, in a very friendly tone (no sneering) and hopefully she'll back off. If she doesn't drop the issue, then you'll need to take a different route, but rude comments will only make things worse, and may potentially damage your relationship.

Answer 8

ehhh at your age ... I wouldn't be asking unless you're laughing or crying or whatever and I really wanted to know what was going on.  I have a 17 yr old and the first time he tells me something sarcastic or something not true, the phone will be mine.

Answer 9

its hard your mum is trying to connect with you in some way try not being to hard on her also she used to being part of everthing in your life and its hard for us mums to take a back seat and let you have the privicy that you want be gentle and talk to your mum reasure her that you are safe and its just friends talking to you and that if you need her you will come to her

Answer 10

No, they don't unless they're just poking around. My parents have always been nice enough to respect my privacy.

Tell her you're an adult and you'd like to have your own space, but tell her nicely. She might not realize she's being a pest.

Answer 11

I suggest you to talk to her nicely and tell her that you really feel that she should give you abit more privacy and that you have grown up and blah blah.

Don't snap at her or throw a tantrum tho. It will make you look immature and it won't work.

Answer 12

well my mom did it when i was like 15.

but since your 18, she shouldnt be as strict anymore..

Answer 13

I am the guardian of my 15 yr old sister...from time to time I will ask. Normally I get c**k *** answers...really I ask to show an interest. Communication is important.

Sadly if you want her out of your business then move out..your almost 19. If you don't want to them stop whining about it. Parents are nosey they worry about you and check on you and want to communicate with you. It is their job.