Parents who are divorced: Anyone getting sick of the dad having no rules, and ruining your kids?

Question

Parents who are divorced: Anyone getting sick of the dad having no rules, and ruining your kids?

Answer 1

Not me personally, but my sister-in-law sure is. She's trying to potty train their daughter and she finally makes progress, then she spends a week at her dad's and he doesn't follow through on anything. My SIL ends up right back where she started when her daughter comes home. Very frustrating.

Answer 2

No, because I am the dad. I sure am tired of their mother thinking the kids can do what ever they want when they happen to see her. I have custody and she only get every other weekend. Recently reinstated. She had not seen the kids for almost a year. She does not discipline them or set chores or even make them clean up behind themselves. She lets them do as they please. The kids tell me this.

Answer 3

It sounds like it is time for you to take action. The next time  the kids get picked up, ask for a private moment to talk. Tell daddy dear all the important "stages and issues" in your kids lives, impress on him just how important it is that you stay united and a team, or the kids will see any and all rivalries and difference and use them against each of you later, (trust me, those teen years will only get harder).  

I would suggest formally outlining rules that will at all times apply at both homes. AND THEN STICK WITH THEM. If dad sees the need to ground them, mom must comply and so on. If mom says no to a cell phone - no dating at 15 or no  makeup. . . dad must comply. Set all the foreseeable rules now, everyone will be happier and healthier for it.

Communication is the answer.

Answer 4

It would be nice if you and he could discuss and agree on basic rules, but this is the real world.

The custodial parent has the final say on big issues such as dating and cell phones.

If he refuses to comply and you can document problems that his laxness and refusal to cooperate with you is causing with your kids, you can make a legal issue out of it.

Answer 5

Well i my point of view i have my daughter 95% of the time, the other 5 is with her mom who is never around. So if im trying to teach her something like potty training and i tell her mom, her mom doesnt follow through so yeah im sick of it when im trying to teach my kid something and she goes off to another place and the teaching doesnt keep going and she gets away with anything when she's with her mom. It is frustrating

Answer 6

my mother and father have been devoriced since i was 3, & i havent talked to him in 13 years so be glad hes in there life at all, think he will never walk me down the isle and he won bee at my graduation & he will not even know when hes going to be a grandpa.truely be glad hes in there lives dont take that away from them.

Answer 7

Funny its just the opposite with me.  Mom has no rules at her house.  Then my kids come back with the worst attitude and it takes me all week to get them back into the swing of things, then they go right back to moms to run wild again.