Part of the birthday gift is missing; should I tell my brother and sister-in-law?

Question

My sister-in-law is totally awesome at remembering everyone's birthday and sends a cute card with personal touches from my little niece. For the children, she also sends a few dollars, corresponding to their age, usually in check form. This time, she sent the new Andrew Jackson dollar coins. Since my son turned 2, I'm pretty sure there were supposed to be 2 of them and there looks like there are 2 outlines on the envelove where 2 coins would have been, one in each corner. But, the edge of the envelope was torn open enough that it looks like one of them was lost in the mail.

When we thank her for the card, should we mention it to her...I guess sort of so that she knows that they are easily lost and can either use a different envelope, like padded, or not send them? Or should I just say thank you and not mention it? I just don't want her to feel bad. If I were in her place, I would probably want to know, but I don't know if that's how everyone feels.

Should I tell her? Would you want to know?

Answer 1

Honesty is always the best policy.  Say that you are very happy with the coin that you got but that the other must have ripped through the envelope.  I would want to know.  

Answer 2

I had the same thing happen to me, although it was a gift card that was stolen. I didnt come right out and tell her, I just called and said thank you for the card, and that it was kinda wierd because someone had opened the envelope..from there she asked me if the gift card was still in there, and I said no. From there you can tell her that next time maybe use a padded envelope. That way no one can tell what is in there. It is sad that it has come to this..but that is what we have to do!  

Answer 3

I would tell her. If it were me, I would want to know.   It would give me an idea of how to ship the gift better.  Anyone would want to know how to do better!  Just tell her that she doesn't have to feel bad or anything, but you just wanted to let her know in-case she ever wants to ship something like that again.

Good luck. God Bless.

Answer 4

I've sent money that never got there.  Sometimes I get other people's mail, I assume the reverse is true.

Answer 5

No.  I wouldn't want to know.  She will feel obligated to replace, and it will take some of the joy of giving out of it for her.

Answer 6

I would just say thank you for THE coin and hopefully when she hears you say THE coin instead of coinS, she will say something to you first, this way you don't bring it up and it was a mistake.  

Answer 7

Yes, I think you should.

say thanks, say it was lovely,say you appreciate her feelings.

but tell her the reality as well.

suppose one day she comes to your home, finds those coins missing.. then she'll feel worse..

let her be aware, simultaneously show your affection to that incomplete object as well, signifying that for you, feelings matter only..

Answer 8

I would want to know.  And she might want a "reminder" not to send cash through the mail.

I would let her know that the envelope was torn, so she can understand your concern isn't that she "shorted" the birthday boy, but rather the security of mailing cash in general, coins in particular.