Paternity test may be wrong...?

Question

My husband has a 4 1/2 year old son. When we first started dating, his son was 1 1/2. The mother and my husband dated for less than a month, and he didnt even find out she was pregnant until my stepson was born. When he found out she slammed him with Child support. He requested a paternity test done, as he found out she is horribly promiscuous, and she immediately dropped her whole child support case. He petitioned her then for the test and it was "99.99% accurate compared to an unrelated Caucasian male" Shortly after my husband and I started dating, we heard that my stepsons mom slept with my husbands brother around the same time. My husbands brother swears up and down he did not sleep with her, although before she found out she was pregnant she was bragging she slept with both of them.

When we looked into the test, we found out it is completely inaccurate when there is question between relatives.

She has made our lives h**l, my husband tries so hard to maintain a relationship with his son, yet she does not let him talk to his son on the phone between weekend visitations (she won't answer his calls), and refused him any extra visitation (he ended up going to court to get more). It is horrible.

It has been put out of our head for a couple of years now, until this past weekend. My husband's brother was taking my stepson for a ride on the jetski. His mother in law mentioned how they walked so much a like and and carried themselves the same (she has no idea of the situation). This left both my husband and I feeling the need to finally find out the truth. There is a paternity test he can get done quietly with just his DNA and my stepsons DNA. The question is, do we do it? My husband gets so frustrated when my stepsons mom puts him through h**l, and then his mind wanders to whether his son is really his or not. We both think he is, but it will always haunt us. On the other hand, if my stepson is not his, where do we go from there? We also have a 2 1/2 year old son as well that absolutely loves his brother. It would be so hard on his son to find out his father was not his father, but on the other hand, it would be even harder when he is older. He really should have had this done when he first heard the rumor, but his brother swore he only kissed her. What would you do?

Answer 1

it really doesnt matter what the dna test says because he loves his son and his son loves him.  even if he is his brothers child at least its not a stranger that you are wondering about.  i really think it would be harder for everyone involved to continue with this foolishness.  my sons daddy was told he was the father  of a little boy and he raised him for 8 years before requesting a paternity test when he found out the child was not his it hurt him but because he loves that child he is still the only daddy that the child has ever known and the boy lives with him.  he was dealing with someone he did not know so i would think it would be easier for you all since you seem to be close with the brother.  dont punish the child because the mother acted in less than acceptible way.  good luck

Answer 2

I would want to find out the truth.

Answer 3

do it asap

Answer 4

Ok, I'd say that if you are wondering, and if the mother is such a pain that this needs to be done... I'd say that at least you'd know for sure if it's is yours, so at least this is not questioned any more... regardless if the mother is not one that is really a mother to the child.

Now, as far as his step brother... or your son... don't worry about him loosing his playmate... by the time he is 6 he will have all but forgotten about this "brother" if it turns out that it is not your step-son after all. It's better to do it now when he is not going to remember things than later on when it will be a major blow.

good luck...

Answer 5

What on earth can the identity of the biological father possibly have to do with the fact that your family loves this child. Fatherhood is not a DNA match. Fatherhood is love and support. Your husband is already the child's father, regardless of anything a DNA test might say. His love should not be qualified by the results of a paternity test. In other words: who the bloody h**l cares who the sperm donor is. I doubt that is all this child means to your family. So forget it. What possible difference can it make?