People With Kids: Would You Allow Them To...?

Question

use a messenger at 11 yrs old? This child is allowed to use it at home but in my house we do not allow it. I feel 11 is too young... am I being unreasonable here?

Answer 1

NO, if you do it, then they will feel like rebeling against you, tell him that he is allowed, and NO cursing, and you will check itevery 2 months or so, and after a year of no problems, you will let him use it freely. and if any of these (your) rules are broken, no internet 4 2 weeks. if you dont let him have freedom and trust, then his rebellion stage will be h**l. Its the teens that had all these restrictions that end up pregnant and druging, ive seen it many times. and BTW, i had messenger wen i was 7

Answer 2

Its too young.  Young people need to be interacting with each other in person.  It is a learned skill for most.  You don't interact with people on line the same way you do with live people.  Then there is also the risk of talking to perverts...

Answer 3

I would not allow messenger. you know i think they have home versions of products like surf control 8) they let you block categories on the internet automatically. We use it at the school district i work for.

And i commend you for watching what your child does on line. Have you seen some of the stuff kids put on here? and there are other sites that are much worse as i am sure you know.  

Answer 4

u shouldnt let another kid do stuff at ur house if ur own kids arent allowed to do it...

Answer 5

no i feel the same it is too young and if you dont moniture it always she/ he would talk to some stranger and they are to small to noe the dangers of it  

Answer 6

My kid, I would only let him talk to family on it, and he would be very closely monitored. Someone elses kid, nope, not while at my house, im not gonna be responsible for anything that *might* happen

its ok, I occasionally check my 8 year old step daughters back pack for "contraband" lol im just nosy

Answer 7

when i was about 13 my mom did that to me i found out how to change it and i did

Answer 8

It depends on the child, how mature he/she is. I would prefer that MY 11 year old kids would do other things than IM online, like play outside and be kids.

Maybe you can allow your son/daughter a limited supervised time as a reward for something, or set a goal "you can do it when you turn 12 for 15 minutes/day" so she/he won't resent you for being too strict compared to the friend's parents who can IM at 11. Also, I would strongly suggest talking to your child about it and try to thoroughly explain your decision either way.

And your child's friend should follow the rules of your house when he/she's over, so no worries about not allowing it.

You are not being unreasonable, just a good parent and I commend you for it.

Answer 9

I don't allow my 11 year old to use it, of course she has never asked, but if she did ask the answer would be no.

Answer 10

well, i used AIM messenger when i was 9, and my mom and dad allowed it. on AIM you can only talk to people on your buddy list, and AOL. but in the yahoo messenger i dont know. i would let him, but check what hes been doing. make sure no bad content, thats all. but PLEASE dont be that mom thats always like, NO you cant go on that because you can see other peoples words and talk back!!!! UNSAFE!!!!!!! trust him, you've got nothing to lose if you taught him right!

Answer 11

I think your just being a mom i would not let my child at 11 i think that is way to young i would not alow my child boy or girl at age 11 to have a cell phone either, there are way to many creepy people in the world today, they only reason i would let my child on the computer at that age would be for school work, or playing games and not online unless i was there with them

Answer 12

i think i had one when i was 9 or 10. why would it be too young? they're just talking to their friends.

Answer 13

It depends with who. I'm allowed use with relatives and friends I know in the "real" world witch I think is reasonable.

Answer 14

It sounds like this is not your child. If your house rules are no messenger, then this child must follow the house rules in your house.  

Answer 15

In my humble opinion, I think that children have been given too many things that should wait until they're a little older.  When my daughter came to me at age 10 and wanted to start shaving her legs I told her absolutely not--that if she did that at such a young age, what would be left for her to do when she got older.  Today she's 40, has a child of her own, and understands what I meant way back then.  I'm still pretty old-fashioned, but that's me, not the rest of the world!

Answer 16

my daughter is almost 12yr old and soon i'll be allowing her to use MSN but when i'm in the room.........i will know who she's chatting to , The main reason i'll be setting it up is she's got a rare medical condition and will be chatting to other girls from the support group. Every one of  these girls i've met and also theirs mothers (and some fathers).. all us parents will be keeping checks on the girls for safety reasons.. we have each others phone numbers etc.......It's so the girls  can chat about how their condition affects them etc as it's important they do not feel alone........

Answer 17

11 is too young. Mine is 20 now and I still would keep him from it if I could. I think 30 is just about the right age.

Answer 18

It would be monitored and I would have the decisionon who my daughter would talk to.  There would be a time limit on computer use, and if this wan't followed or became an issue, I would cut the internet.