People think that I come off as rude ?

Question

Growing up I had a very rough childhood. My father was emotionally abusive towards me and my mom. My father's family hated my mother and I as well, they continually put us down all the time. Inside I am the nicest person, and those that are close to me have said so. But those that I just meet think that I come off as rude, I assume because of my body language or my blunt words. I've been broken hearted so much that I think I have changed myself to be blunt in order to protect myself. So how can I make myself not come off as so rude?

Answer 1

To be frank, after such an abusive childhood, you probably need counselling.

You probably at some level expect people to treat you badly and/or reject you, so you're acting in a defensive, cold hearted way. It's not your fault, but best to try to resolve those problems at the level requied.

Answer 2

What an utterly rude question to ask.

Answer 3

One word  "therapy"

Answer 4

Talk to a counselor. They can help you come across on the outside like you are on the inside.

Answer 5

Just think before you speak. Though when kids with rough childhoods are rude or mean it is looked at as acceptable and reasonable, it's not always right. It's okay and we understand where you came from but you can't let those negative experiences and bad past influence the future.

If you have an attitude, one that may not be the perkiest, well that is okay. But if you remember to think about what you are about to say before you say it, then it will help you.

You are right when it comes to protecting yourself too. But sometimes you have to let people in, or else they can't ever get close enough to you.

if you keep letting your past get in the way of what you are doing in the future, then the past will repeat itself in another form. You don't want to change yourself, you just want to remember that your past is not an excuse to make people feel sorry for you or accept rudeness and it be okay, don't lay your past on them and expect sympathy or a plausible explanation and remember we all have feelings, put yourself in their position and think about what you are getting read to say.

Answer 6

smile even if you have to fake it   i do same type situation for me  

Answer 7

Just have a very pleasant and attractive personality with a great warm heart and a very friendly smile.

Don't let yourself think what people might be thinking once you've been nice to them. Ignore those doubts. They don't mean anything once you've done your job as being nice to them with words of love, comfort, kindness, and respect.

In other words, if you fulfill your needs as being a kind person to them, don't worry about anything else. That's all that matters.

Hope this helps