Phoenix wrote a poem. Is it acceptable?

Question

On the Martian Regolith

by Phoenix (aka Elaine P)

My designation is “Phoenix,” from a mythological creature,

An ornithic absurdity with one well-known feature:

I t periodically burns, then is reborn from the ash,

In Human colloquial speech, this is sheer balderdash.

My shovel continually perforates the regolith,

A substance I shall not hesitate to explain forthwith:

It is the dusty top layer of Planet Mars’ soil,

Formed from the impact of meteoric toil.

Mars’ tectonic plates, unlike Earth’s, never collide,

The atmosphere is composed of 95% carbon dioxide,

The temperature ranges from 68 degrees Fahrenheit

To negative 225 during the frigid Martian night.

The colors of Mars take on quite different hues

From those of Earth, a planet often called blue,

At mid-day the sky colors range from reddish to pink,

But sunsets are bluish, at least that is what I think.

I have learned to write poems from mathematician Euwaite,

I hope all who read this will think it is great.

Answer 1

nice touch there, i give it a star. good stuff keep it up

Answer 2

I do, indeed, think it is great. A Mars poem with a whole new feel.   Is this inspired by the Data poem?  Very creative and a job well done.  I'm still trying to think one up.

Answer 3

You've outdone yourself, yet again.  I like Mars colors of sky and sunsets.  Very imaginative, or is it technically correct?

Answer 4

it sounds like a book report put in poem form. it's too fact-filled, too concrete. poetry should be a little abstract, don't you think?

unless it's for school. if it's for school, awesome.

Answer 5

I like it.

Answer 6

Exquisite, This should have you first in line, on the first lift off.

Answer 7

I think It`s very Great.

Answer 8

I thought that I should never see,

A bird that wrote as good as me.

But now I see that I was wrong,

The Phoenix sings a lovely song.

So here I sit and wait anew,

To hear another song from you.

I hope Ms Kilmer cannot see,

This silly poem wrote by me.

Answer 9

Intriguing--I'd no idea Mars ever reached 68 degrees.  I am assuming that is 68 plus, not minus.

Oh, the poetry is nice as well.

Answer 10

Indeed it is!  Poor little Phoenix all alone on the cosmic beach with his shovel and pail.  A prodigy in a strange land...as is the Author.

Answer 11

Another classic from you!

Answer 12

I know how difficult it is to write poetry, while hampered by the syllables of the facts you want to convey.  (My odes for departing staff would compel me to rhyme things like the Chief Engineer of the Dudley Southern ByPass - man, it was hard.)  You have managed it....oops, sorry, I mean Phoenix has managed it.

This is suspiciously like a genuine, properly constructed poem....are you moving away from the light-side?

Answer 13

No fair!! Phoenix has a personal trainer!!

Great job!

Answer 14

big poem

big planet

big math lol!

big everything!

i like the pink days and blue night part.

and how you are digging in to a world

to seek.