Phoning in sick, what's the funniest / strangest reason you have heard?

Question

A guy I used to work with phoned in sick with sore hair once, very strange.

Answer 1

best one i've heard is because someone had a touch of the hiv. (pronounced like div). lol but he said he will be fine after a couple hours sleep!

Answer 2

One of my cashiers called in saying she had a Squirrel in her house and couldn't get off the bed to come to work lol  

Answer 3

One of my workmates called in to say that her boyfriend had 'fallen on top of her and cracked her rib'

Apparently he'd 'tripped over a chair' and he landed on top of her and squashed her flat!

edit: also, my younger brother wanted to ring in sick once and I told him to say he had 'constipation' for a joke, but he didn't know what it meant and the woman said 'do you mean diarrhoea?' and he replied... '...um... well a bit of both really...'

That job didn't last long!

Answer 4

1. Employee was poisoned by his mother-in-law.

2. A buffalo escaped from the game reserve and kept charging the employee every time she tried to go to her car from her house.

3. Employee was feeling all the symptoms of his expecting wife.

4. Employee called from his cell phone, saying that he was accidentally locked in a restroom stall and that no one was around to let him out.

5. Employee broke his leg snowboarding off his roof while drunk.

6. Employee's wife said he couldn't come into work because he had a lot of chores to do around the house.

7. One of the walls in the employee's home fell off the night before.

8. Employee's mother was in jail.

9. A skunk got into the employee's house and sprayed all of his uniforms.

10. Employee had a bad case of hiccups.

11. Employee blew his nose so hard, his back went out.

12. Employee's horses got loose and were running down the highway.

13. Employee was hit by a bus while walking. 14. Employee's dog swallowed her bus pass.

15. Employee was sad.

Answer 5

i phoned in sick, said my pc had a virus lol

Answer 6

cant come in today theres some good stuff on tv

cant come in today my bike's got a puncture

Answer 7

"Hello" I say "Hello" The Bosses Seceratary Says Continuing with A Question "Why Are you not in Work?" "Sick of Being A Slave " I Reply

Answer 8

I knew a lady who called in sick because her car was broken down and she lived across the street from the office...lol..

Answer 9

i had a guy that every 6 or 7 months would say  his mother in law passed on and he had to go to her wake --- after about 3 of these i ask him what was the deal and with out batting an eye he said "my father married a lot"!!!

Answer 10

When I worked in Switzerland a colleague rang in saying he had a bad cold and turned up next day with a red stripe across his face where he hadn't creamed himself in and got sunburnt skiing.

Answer 11

Death in the family (her cat had died). I know this is sad but no reason to be off work.