Please Help!!! Not even married for 1 year and my husband has brought up divorce, what should I do? ?

Question

My husband & I got married in October (2007). We were only together for about a year prior the the wedding. Why we rushed...I dont know?! There was really no reason for us to. We just both thought we were ready and that there was no reason to wait.

Neither of us have any kids, therefore, no stress there...No cheating, non of theat...For some reason, we just dont seem to get along like we use to...like there is no *spark* left. (yea, I know...pretty sad for only be 21 and married not even 1 year). our s*x life is pretty much non-exsistent.

We do NOT communitcate whatesoever,He will not express any emotion to me or try to fix big arguments/fights...he just expects them to go away and for me to forget.

Over the weekend, we had the biggest fight ever!

He threatened to kill himself because life with me is a living h**l....i'm boring/no fun/too uptight.....and he even mentioned the "D" word...

Not only did he mention it, he flat out said he wanted it!

After I about died from an anxiety attack, he must have felt bad for me or something and said that he didnt mean what he said and to just drop the whole situation...act like it never happened...

SOOO, to shorten this up (sorry)...obviously, this is something that is just not going to "go away". And apparently this is something that he has been thinking about quite often. And with the look that he had in his eyes when he said that he wanted a divorce, I truly believe he meant every word. I could probably go on forever...but here is my

QUESTION

? : What do I do from here? I want things to work so badly and i will not initiate a divorce. Am I happy living like this? No...& Obviously he isn't either...I feel like I've tried everything in the book and things just arent getting any better. Sometimes I feel like I'm married to myself...like I'm just living in a house with a stranger.

Is there any hope for us?

What do i do?

Answer 1

marriage counselor, if it doesn't work, you know you tried your hardest.

And birth control

Answer 2

RUN, don't walk, to the nearest marriage counselor.  Find one first thing tomorrow morning and make an appt.  Don't wait for your husband to agree.  If he won't go, you go.  And if you profess a faith, I suggest a counselor that lines up with your faith.  

If you work on your marriage and really make the necessary changes to become a better you, your marriage WILL improve.  Don't wait for your husband to change - - you go first. He will be inspired by you.

Obviously there was something wonderful to make you want to marry in the first place.  Listen to his feedback and work on your faults, and trust me, he'll do the same.  

Answer 3

Don't give up without counseling, and y'all have got to get it back together sexually. If you need to talk about it do, or just go to him and initiate s*x. Tonight. It might feel weird since you've been so unhappy, but you two are way too young to be living without s*x. He refuses what?

Answer 4

if he doesn't agree to see a marriage counselor or talk this out then you know its over at least you are young enough to remarry the second time it will take time to heal I hope he reaches out to you and tries to save this marriage but if not at least  you tried

Answer 5

If your choice is live like that or initiate the divorce, are you really going to pick living like that, no s*x, no communication, screaming fights? If he REALLY wants to make it work, you have a chance, just a chance, with a serious commitment to counseling. If he doesn't, there's no chance, and you get to make that choice. Find out now.  

Answer 6

dont hold on to things i.e. him saying the "d" word and arguments you have had, move on he does thats why he can forget the fights, everyday is a chance to be better you cant change whats happend but you can try and make tommorow happy , and i hope you will be  

Answer 7

marriage counselling

Now!

Answer 8

In the beginning of a relationship it feels like "all you need is love."  As the relationship matures the realities of life and the imperfections in us all begin to show that love alone is not enough.  You need to "work" at being happy.

It sounds so unromantic - but it is a fact in every relationship.  So you guys obviously don't know how to do this on your own (the same as me and most people), therefore you need a professional to teach and guide you in the ways of successful interaction.  HOW UNROMANTIC!  So true, but anything good in life is maintained by "working on it", and the same is true about relationships.

Get professional counseling and you should be OK.  Get it NOW!! Once the 'D' word gets out of the bottle, it's hard to get it back in there.