Please Help ! why am i so shy ?

Question

i dont get it. i dont want to be shy. and im not shy around my friends or family im like the loudest there :S

but at school....especially with guys! like if they come talk to me..my heart beats faster and i cant think straight i dont know what to say and like my body feels like it freezes. and NO ITS NOT LOVE.lol. how can i overcome my shyness and nervousness? around school im known as the really quiet girl and i dont wanna be that girl..at school when we do group work.. i get so nervous and usually i dont talk to anyone in the class so i get put into a group usually if there isnt someone nice enough to ask me..and its affecting my education..like ive failed classes and i skip alot because of my stupid shyness/nervousness.im 17 by the way. im desperate pleasee help !

Answer 1

The short answer:  It's just part of who you are. It's looking pretty certain that there is a genetic predisposition to being shy.  The second link I've posted goes into that a bit.  But I think you'll find the  first link  more interesting.

I'm not one to try to turn everything into a disease, but here's the thing:  If you've failed a class because of your shyness, (and I totally believe you have), then, for you, shyness IS a disability.  You're probably not going to get to collect checks from the government for it, (bummer),  but understanding it as something more than some sort of personal failure is important. Because you have to do more than endure it.

If you were, say,  dyslexic would you (and your parents) decide, "Nope, can't read, too hard, end of story." ?  What you'd probably do is work your butt off overcoming the disability and learn to read, because you know everything from getting a  driver's license to a job you want  depends, partly,  on being able to read.

I'm not going to talk down to you, you're months away from officially being an adult. I'll just suggest, as Aunt (3rd link) Susan does,  "extrapolate".  

Good luck.

Answer 2

I am like that too but since I  only have a 3 years left in school I want to make as many friends as I can and have as much fun too because soon There will not be anymore fun or friends just work so I wan to enjoy every moment. Get to know you class mates not every body just a couple then surely you will meet the friends of the friends like a snowball effect Like me have fun