Question:

Please critique my poem of despair!?

by  |  earlier

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No More Convenient Fantasies

--------------------------------------...

The smile of a summer breeze

Epidermal membrane pleased

Denies my brain of what it sees

These and other fantasies

I can't deny we eat the dead

Lesser than I inside my head

This pattern seen above, again

Our misery, their daily bread

The blessed blinding of the sun

Can not undo the damage done

Too many worlds have split from one

My mind is spun, and body numb.

I said I would take one step back

Unbiased view of worldly acts

I fell too far and found the fact

Humanity is what I lack

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2 ANSWERS


  1. This poem has elements of greatness.  Truly.


  2. if u were going for scary emo-ish, it's great!!!! i feel like crawling underground and becoming a hermit now!

    but seriously, if it weren't so scary, it would be a reallly good poem! u have a talent!

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