Please give me advice about what to do !?

Question

My 4 year old son is going through a really testing phase at the moment i regards to his sleeping (or lack of it!).

He goes to bed, and before i am even down the stairs, he has got all of his toys out, and has started playing. So i go into his bedroom, and tiday them all away, or take them into my room instead.

Yet again, he gets more toys out, and the whole thing repeates itself for about 2 hours!

I have tried being really calm, and telling him nicely.

I have tried everything!

Its getting to the point when i am DREADING bedtime, as i know this will hapeen, its been every night for about a month.

I love my son so much, but some nights i have to just ignore him for 5 mins, while i go downstairs and take a breather, coz i get so angry.

Please help me! What can i do to get him to sleep!

He is worn out at nursery everday, and i know he is tired enough to go to sleep because he yawns and asks to go to bed, and in the morning i have to wake him because he is so tired!

He has always been a good sleeper until now!

Answer 1

remove all the toys and tell him he will get them back when he starts listening to mommy and being a good boy

and try not to go back in after putting him to bed as long as you come back he gets what he wants

good luck

Answer 2

make sure he exorcises during the day, that should make him very sleepy by bed time.

also, you shouldn't be so lenient for him. He needs to learn a little discipline, and if he doesn't learn it now... it will come back and haunt you in his teenage years. make sure he understands there are consequences (or rewards if hes good) to his actions.

Answer 3

You've tried everything - like what?

Have you given him rewards for staying in bed and sleeping?  "If you don't take your toys out tonight, tomorrow we can go for ice cream!" or whatever he likes to do.  Then do it.

"If you take your toys out tonight, you will not be able to do ________ (fill in the blank) tomorrow".  Then don't back down.

If he takes his toys out repeatingly, then all his toys in his room go in a big bin (or two) and they go into your room.  Each day, put a toy back, but he is still not allowed to play with this toy at night.  If he plays with it, it goes back in the bin.  Keep doing this until all the toys are back in his room.  

Answer 4

I have a child like this. Bless you for being so patient with him. mine, he is 13 and still doing it. Good Grief!

Anyway, here is what I do. I have done this since he was little and it works, mostly. You can't completely control them but you can try, right. Anyway....

I give him one toy to take to bed with him, just one, and he has to choose and he cannot get out of bed to exchange it for another. I let him learn that rule, which took about one week. Then he was looking forward to bedtime, and didn't get up anymore.

Then he started changing on me and figured he could drag bedtime out by taking forever to choose the toy. So, then I made a pile of 5-10 toys that he could choose from, and I timed him. If he didn't make his choice within 5 minutes (longest 5 minutes of the day) then I would choose for him.

My son is mentally behind, so you can't really use it as an example of it not working. I have many friends who use this process and they have perfect results with it. My son being 13 and still getting up out of bed is simply because he has issues. The toy problem stopped altogether, and now he gets up and says he forgot to tell me something. Now, I put a pad and pencil by his bed and he can write what he has to say and tell me the next morning.

Most of the time when kids get back up after they've been put to bed is because they need chill time as well. If you offer them a book or a toy that does not make noise,then they will fall asleep playing with it. It is their way of conditioning themselves for sleep. They are merely learning who they are in terms of psychology, like what they need for rest and relaxation. Once they learn a schedule and their relaxation is accepted and worked into that schedule they tend to fall fast asleep without even playing with the toy they chose.

Answer 5

Try setting up a bed time routine where you have time to read him a story. That way he has your attention (he may keep playing with his toys because you come back into the room when he does that), it's a quiet and calm activity you can do together and hopefully by the end of the story he is, or very nearly, asleep.

Good luck!

Answer 6

Hiya

I would take the toys out of his room at bedtime, and if he keeps getting up just simply put him back in his bed and stress to him that its night time

My son used to wake in the night, until we started putting him back in his bed, and leaving him, yes we were tired, but it worked and now he sleeps straight through! :)

good luck xx

Answer 7

This might sound silly.. but it works with my son who is just shy of 15 months.

Make saying goodnight to all of his toys part of the bedtime routine. Explain to him that his toys are tired, and have to go night night too so that they will have the energy to play with him tomorrow.

If all of his toys are in a central location (I have a toy organizer at home) you can even have your son help you put a blanket over them to "tuck them in" at night.

Prior to doing that, make sure any toys that make noise are turned off so that if he does try to grab one, it wont do anything.. because it's "tired" and needs to go to bed. =)

Classical music also helps too. I almost always have music playing while my son is asleep.

Just make sure that whatever you do, you are consistent. Make sure the bedtime routine is the same every single night.

(For example.. our bed time routine.. saying night night to all the toys, night night to the lights as we turn each one off.. brush teeth... turn music on .. in bed with favorite blankie.. kiss good night.. and off to dream land!)  

Answer 8

it is hard i know i took care of my Nephew an watched him go through the same thing...   You have to get him on a scedule  this is normal  so dont worry, make bed time fun for him..    if he is four bed time shouold be 7:00pm (just an opioion)  so at 6:00pm  after dinner its bath time than tell him to take out a Book to read  or color  or a bedtime song... let him choose so that way he can feel important.......   once you do one of the following try a warm glass of milk an explain to him that BEDTIME is very important an that he will grow up to be a very strong BOY  ...... it will be hard the first nights but if you are FIRM and STRICT show him you are the BOSS an it will get better but you have to be FIRM children are very SMAT at this age an he will try anyting to make you feel sorry for him so he wont have to go to bed but you have to be STRONG...  my NEPHEW lied an said he had a tummmy ache but than he asked to play the playstaion lol lol lol so just hang in there i PROMISE it will get better My little Nephew now goes to bed with out me telling an waits to be tugged in....

Answer 9

I suggest removing all toys from his room. Temporarily store them in a place where he cannot access them without your permission.  Explain that he must earn them back by behaving at bedtime.  Then give them back 1 at a time, as long as he behaves.  Let him know under no uncertain terms that if his behavior regresses then he will lose the toys again and have to start from scratch.  At the end of a certain period - say 2 weeks - if he does well then he'll earn a new toy of his choice.

Answer 10

It may take a few nights, but put him to bed and wait by the door. As soon as you hear him get out of bed you step in and put him back. explain that it is time for bed and playing is not acceptable. Repeat without the explaination until he understands that it is getting up and playing is the problem as opposed to playing with specific toys. It may take a while, like I said. But this is the way to do it.  

Answer 11

take ALL his toys away leave nothing but his bedding and books and put a small lock on his door if he leaves his room to get his toys.and i

say books b/c if hes going to be up and about try to encourage his reading skills.h**l be asleep before you know it.

Answer 12

why havent you taken the toys out of the room and just leave a teddy or cuddle toy in for him

Answer 13

Have you tried the bedtime story?

Make punishments for not going to bed.

Pop the childs butt if he gets outta bed once you have warned him.

My boyfriend's sister has a three year old. I've seen exactly what you're talking about.

My parents are chiropractors so sometimes I use this natural formula to relax and sleep. It's called 303's. It helps to relax. If you crushed up not even a whole tablet into his chocolate milk before bedtime he should be good til the morning. Look into it. It's a root, so its no mediation or persription.

Answer 14

I went thru this with my bf's little boy... I started playing a movie for him and his little sister before they went to bed and let them lay in the bed and watch the movie till they feel asleep... Kept them in the bed at least...

Answer 15

you can try camling activities before bed if yo uhavnt already such as reading a lavender bath or just sitting quietly coloring.

then at bedtime take ALL the toys out of his room and if he still keeps getting up then make bedtime earlier the next day tell him "if you dont go to sleep now tommorow youll go to bed at xx time" make it 15 minutes earlier each night till he catches on.

this may help

my friend has the same problem adn to be honest shes at her witts end. Shes called the doc and was told to give her daughter a little bennadryll. the liquid kind, but her daughter is ADHD.

good luck and sweet dreams

hopefully anyway huh?

xx

Answer 16

I would simply tell him any toys he takes out he looses for two days and stick to it. I bet it would only take 1 or 2 times and he will quit. If he gets back up and takes out more then take those away. I had to do this to my daughter for fits I would take a toy each time for 2 days and if she had another fit I took another. One day she had 20 things taken away in one day, and she was about 4. After that day things got a lot better because she knew I would follow through. No matter how much they beg and cry keep it for the full 2 days (and nights). And do not make idle threats, if you threaten you better follow through or you will set yourself back a mile.

Answer 17

Take ALL toys out of his room other than what he sleeps with. Put on some soothing music, like classical. It will lull him to sleep, and it is good for their brain development. Keep putting him back in bed and sternly tell him it is time for night-night. If you act like it is a game he will keep doing it.

Answer 18

Give him a choice of one toy to sleep with at night. Tell him he must stay in bed with the toy. Put his toy box in your room.  The less fuss you make about this the better.  It is normal and it will pass.

Answer 19

Do not worry! That will probably go away in a while. While its there, try these tips:

1. Threats: the ugly evil gutmanboogie will eat you if you wont sleep!

2. Lie: "Sonny, I will give you this sleep juice (while the

"sleep juice" is just regular fruit juice) and you will see magical dreams, all you need to do is drink it and go to bed and close your eyes!"

3. Act: pretend you are crying because he isn't sleeping. That usually works with young children.