Please help Desperate lol

Question

I know im not a parent but my sister has asked me for help and this is the only reason i can think of.. My nephew hasn't been sleeping through the night ever since my sister started having a relationship with this man.. It was a very violent relationship and they would argue forever during the night.. This is why i think my nephew forever now wakes up during the night because he's scared and he can sense the fear in my sister and he wants to know if she's ok.. (He's 2 and a half) The relationship has ended but my nephew still wakes up during the night.. How can my sister get him to sleep through the night.. My sister has split up from this boyfriend for 10 months now and hasn't had a boyfriend on the scene since Please help xx

Answer 1

The poor little sod - Ring social services, maybe he'll sleep better in care.!!.

She has already emotionally scarred him, she should of walked the day he scared the little lad!.

Answer 2

Even though he may not understand her, she needs to reassure him that things are OK every night before going to bed. SHe doesn't have to mention the boyfriend specifically. When tucking him in, she might say, "OK, lets see if we're ready. You're warm, and here's teddy (or whatever he might sleep with), and you're safe and sound, and Mommy's safe and sound." Having a little conversation about it every night might do him good. It may take a while to get him back into sleeping through the night, so she'll just have to ride it out. DON'T, however, encourage her to let him sleep with her. That will start another whole string of problems. Best of luck for your nephew! And I'm glad your sister broke up with the jerk. It shows her son's comfort and safety are most important to her!

Answer 3

wow the baby is really effected by it all

ur sister should maybe reassure her son by many cuddles,kissed,and being close so basically spending a lot of time together

maybe counseling and activities for kids are helpful too

good luck

..im just going with my instinct :)

Answer 4

this might sound a bit drastic but she could consult a child therapist for some advice or the doctor - i have no idea what to do

Answer 5

It could be that his sleep patten has been changed. My son never slept through the night until at 20 months i saw the doctor. He gave me something called Chloral hydrate elixer. What it does is allow sleep to come easier if one wakes up. Gradually my son woke less and less until hey presto he slept through the night. The body is a funny thing its like all week you can struggle to get up with the alarm and then at the weekend you wake up before it. If she goes to the doctor he may give your nephew something to help him sleep and within a short time his sleep pattern will be back to normal. She should also make sure he doesnt sleep during the day as this will also inhibit sleep at night. Also unless she is really against it she could have him sleep next to her for a time untill he settles.

Answer 6

Get her too explain gently the man is not coming back ( and make sure he doesn't. He also needs a nightly routine ie a calm bath and bedtime story and hugs. She also needs to give him lots of praise and encouragement when he is good, and not shout or give him attention when he naughty , just say firmly what he has done wrong, why it is wrong and sit him on the naugty step for two minutes.

The praise etc will give him confidence and he will sleep better.

Answer 7

the events that your sister went through have psychologically affected your nephew...he wakes up needing assurance that all is well....youre sister needs to be very gentle,and make sure that she says that its all gone now.it will take a while,but tell her not to lose her temper as that would make him worse.

Answer 8

Your sister has to remember that babies understand more than they can let on through their speech.  Make sure she has established a routine with him, dinner quiet play, bath story bed or something similar.  Maybe she could read the same book every night, so he starts to learn the story and focuses on this rather than what might happen over night. ( We all know how things that worry us affect our dreams, so she can try to start manipulateing them into something good)

I would also give him something of hers to 'look after for her'.  This means that he will have something that smells of mummy to hold in bed and make him feel safer too.  Tell her not to expect it back!

Talk to him throughout the day too.  Don't mention names, but say how nice and safe she feels now it's just her and him.  Say how much she enjoys spending time with him, and how much she loves him.  Make sure it is a house full of love, and share cuddles and kisses all the time.  This is one way children can sense that something hsa changed, and that mummy is happy now.

Good luck with it all, and I am sure that it is a phase that he will grow out of eventually.  He will be a happy and healthy little boy I'm sure, as he has so many people around to love him and care for him.

Answer 9

thats very sad that such a young child was exposed to that, its unfortunate but it does happen. Perhaps she should move him into her room, that way he is sure that they are safe and together. once he starts sleeping well again then move him back to his room, im afraid there is probably no quick solution to this issue, it will take time to heal, and being so young, he probably wont remember (cross your fingers!).