Please help. I don't know how to handle this.?

Question

My husband's family is very close. His 25 year old niece niece came to live in a room in my hotel. She was escaping an unfaithful boyfriend and said she wanted to start over again. Well, he followed her here, a town about 1000 miles away from his home. Now she has given him a key to the gate and he comes here for s*x and to fight with her. This is NOT what I bargained for!! Can I solve this without being the witch of his family? How?

Answer 1

You said it was your hotel correct? And she said to you that she wanted to escape this bf right. Well ban this guy from your hotel based on the charge of trespassing and intruding. If he doesn't listen just call the cops. Then tell your niece that he is not right for her...sit her down and tell her all the things that he has done to her in the past. Also, it sounds like this guy is using her, tell her that as well and hopefully she will see the light.

Answer 2

The unfortunate truth of it is that you will be considered a “witch” if you get involved in family matters.  Even though your intensions are good and you’re looking out for his niece, someone will have to be put in their place.  I’d work the situation like a flow chart.  Go to his niece first and tell her what you’re feeling, bearing in mind that she’s 25 and obviously wants the guy around.  Then I’d approach your husband and tell him want your intensions are.  Seeing that it’s his family and their issues I’m pretty sure that a verdict coming from him will hold more weight with his niece.  If there’s no resolve between the two, I’d put my foot down and stop being taken advantage of.  Tell the niece that her behaviour while residing at your hotel is unacceptable.  Ask for the gate key back and put a term on how long she can stay.  The whole point of her being there was to rid herself of that relationship, in saying so it seems like she’s broken the contract with you.  From that point on it’s either you or her.  Remember, no good deed goes unpunished.  

Answer 3

Since they are fighting and being disruptive in your place of business I think you are being reasonable to point out to them that their behavior is hurting your business and they need to take their soap opera lives somewhere else. (although please say it more politely than this) I suggest you give them a deadline - "work it out by Halloween or find your own apartment I'll give you 3 months rent money" and then let it go.  

Answer 4

If she's escaping him, then she wouldn't mind you banning him from the hotel? Security?

Answer 5

Discuss your concerns with your husband. Let your niece know that this person who doesn't live there isn't allowed to have a key due to security issues with others. If she objects than she needs to find another place to live, your responsibility is to the guests of your hotel.

Answer 6

You are allowing her to 'escape' to your hotel, which means your hotel, your rules! Either he goes or she goes. It's just as if she were living in your home, rules are to be followed. If she wants to get back together with him, then she is no longer escaping him and therefore the whole principal for which you allowed her to stay has been broken. If she is serious that she no longer wants him in the picture then you or a security person should relieve him of the key and inform him his presence is no longer wanted AFTER she tells him herself.

Don't worry about being the witch of the family, most of them will probably thank you for making her face her own consequences.