Please help! Why would keeping to myself draw more attention?

Question

Guys find me very attractive- probably mostly physically cuz I think I'm average looking... but then again people tell me I should model so I dont know...

I try and keep to myself, I don't like to draw attention, ESPECIALLY from MALES!!! I feel ill equipped and vulnerable at times w/ men. I dont like it. Anyways, I mentioned to a tow truck driver that I dont like attention, I just keep to myself. And he says "well thats why you get attention cuz you keep to yourself." There wasnt a follow up cuz arrived at the location. So is he right? Do I draw more attention to myself for the fact that I keep to myself and am alone most of the time?

Please help cuz I don't want to do something that's going to be harmful.

thx

Answer 1

Not really i mean if you are filled with a room of people talking to each other and you are sitting in the corner yeah people will just look at you but i don't think that would make them want to talk to you.

Answer 2

I'm exactly like you.. I think I look average but I've had several people tell me I should be a model. And I keep to myself as well. I think that gets more attention because we stand out in the crowd - imagine a room full of people mingling with one another, except for one person not doing anything at all. Wouldn't you notice that person?

That's the best I can explain it.

Answer 3

well i find that people who keep to themselves draw more attention because they are more mysterious. you wonder what they're thinking, and how they are feeling, if they're going through problems, or their aspirations, fears and dreams.  

Answer 4

Same problem really take it as a compliment. It's not like you HAVE to be w/ all the guys. Guys like girls that don't act desperate apparently. Act like you don't want them and they'll want you.

Answer 5

He was right. When you stay to yourself you make people curious (or speculate) about you and who you are as a person. When you're out going everyone knows you and knows everything (or what you want them to know) about you.

I really don't understand what would be your reasoning for keeping to yourself? I don't understand why you would want to lead a life where you have no close friends to talk too, or not allow yourself to find a "decent" guy to be in a healthy relationship with. You can't judge all men based on the actions of a few that you chose to deal with. Not every man is bad. And if every man you get with is bad, then the problem is not with them, the problem is with you. It's something in you that is attracted to these  men who cause you nothing but grief and heartache. And until you understand that you'll always have the same type of man cross your path, because sub-consciously that's what you're looking for. Remember, we can only be used if we allow ourselves to be. Your friends/boyfriend don't pick you, you pick them. So do so carefully.

Find a hobby with people who enjoy doing some of the same things as yourself. Because at your age there really is no need for you wanna sit alone, casting judgment on everyone who crosses your path. There are all sorts of interest groups on line that are tailored to people’s specific likes. Find one or two of them, and join them. People are social creatures, and are not meant to live their lives by themselves. And no one wants’ to live in solitude, no matter how much they claim they do. You're problem is you've had some bad experiences at a young age and now you fear trusting anyone because you live "in fear" of being hurt again. Let go and let god! Those who've hurt you will get their just deserves (what goes around comes around). But you can't live your present life in past hurt. Stop being the victim and become the "Victor". Life is short, precious, and never promised. So start living for today and stop living in yesterday.