Please help big problem?

Question

right i had a baby with my ex but then he went on 2 cheat on me while i was 8 months pregnant so we split my family were brill and my ex has had some but not a lot of contact with our daughter.now 2 years down the line hes in a new relationship im happy 4 him.however he has now been kicked out of his mums and has asked to move in with me as hes now homeless (hes girlfriend is not happy bout this).now if i agree to this i will lose my family they hate his guts,i want to help him but i dont think i can i cant lose my family i dont know what to do help me plz i dont want my baby 2 get confused by it all aswel p.s i do not have feelings for him anymore.

Answer 1

O NO !!!!! Dont let him move in of course !!! he just wants to use u ! um sry hes not worth u helping him out nd opening ur doors 2 him !! he's ur daughtr's fathr ! but he came nd saw her jst a couple of times !!! i dont lik him eithr and he's certainy not worth losing ur family ovr !! ur family r the real ppl who love nd care about u.. If he needs help he shuld totaly go get a job... he a fathr 4 god's sake !! he shuld b paying money 4 ur baby's expensez !!!! not askig 2 move over -.-!!!!!!! Tell him 2 ask his presnt girl frnd to move ovr with HER ! that makes more sense....

Plz dont let him move back in :(!! i'd regret it gravly :(

good luck hun :) nd give ur baby a kiss 4 me :)

Answer 2

Don't help him as he abandoned you when he should have been caring and providing for you, his hour of need has came and he now knows what it's like.

Answer 3

It's nice that you care enough to even consider letting him move in, and i understand he is your daughters father. But DO NOT let him move in. Number one, it could very well confuse your daughter. She could get used to him being there, and then what happens when he leaves? Also, you will have to deal with his girlfriend eventually, and thats a sticky situation. And you definitely do not want to lose your family, since they were the ones who stood by you when he hurt you. They have your best interest at heart. And sometimes having a kind heart is not the best, for you or your daughter. Good luck.

Answer 4

No, don't take him in EVER

Answer 5

can´t he stay with his new girlfriend? He must have friends he can go to and why doesn't his mum want him anymore?  It would be a really bad idea for him to move in with you.

He needs to grow up and sort his life out, have regular visits to his daughter and start being a proper father.  meanwhile you need to move on with your life but I suspect that you still have feelings for him.  

Answer 6

STAY AWAY FROM HIM. Your family are more important. He is a big boy he can look after himself, besides why doesn’t he stay with his new girlfriend? It sounds like trouble you really don’t need right now.

Answer 7

there are plenty of homeless hostels up and down the country, tell him to try his local council office. If he's been kicked out of home, chances are he's trouble. Don't feel you have to help him because you have a child together. Why can't his new partner help him?

Keeping your family on your side is more important than helping him, and by the sound of it, your daughter doesn't benefit much from him anyways.

Answer 8

I understand you might want to help him but i think it would be a bad move to let him live with you.

Why doesn't he go live with his g/f ???

it would confuse your baby and she is the most important issue here so tell him your sorry that it wouldn't work out. Good luck.

Answer 9

DO NOT let him move back in, sounds like a disaster!

he was obviously kicked out for a reason and you have obviously got over the pain he caused you but just because you have a child together doesn't mean you should help him!

he can move on with his gf or stay with a friend, or actually sort himself out and find his own place to live!

you don't owe him a thing!

he has a relationship with your child not with you, and you could cause your child confusion

Answer 10

Don't let him back in. He sounds like he's trouble.  

Answer 11

Do not even consider it.

Suppose you were the girlfriend and she was his ex?

Answer 12

Choose your family over your ex period

This guy had no love for you when you were expecting his child kick the creep and get your own life on the road

You say you have no feelings but ask this question are you sure well prove me wrong it's about you and your daughter

Answer 13

tough luck, he treated you like rubbish back along, think of it that way!! you have a little girl to look after now and a family to think about.. you dont have time to worry about him, its his problem so let him sort it, if his girlfriend cared so much why doesnt she take him in? instead of leaving it to his ex? you should just think about yourself and your daughter now, he treated you badly before and cheated on you but now he finds himself homeless he wants you.. no way. i certainly wouldnt.

Answer 14

Would he let you and your baby move in with him if the situation was reversed?

Answer 15

No, he is not your problem - don't risk your relationship with your family. Also take a look at your feelings for him, are you sure there are none? Let him go live with his girlfriend. He must have done something terrible for his family to kick him out. Think of yourself and your baby, not his housing situation.

Answer 16

no its not a good idea for your daughter or his girlfriend. i think it would just cause problems. tell him he will have to find somewhere else, like maybe his grandma or siblings til he gets his own place.

Answer 17

why cant he life with his girlfriend?  Ive been in a simlar situation and I wouldnt let him in, it shounds harsh but you need to think of your child and your familly. if hes old enough to have a child he should be able to sort himself out.

Answer 18

this guy goes from one bad situation to another by the sounds of it.

meanwhile you sound like you have come a long way since the split.

with the help and support of your family you have made a life for you and your daughter.

you must not jeopardise that at any cost!

you say you don't have any feelings for him but you must still care for him or you wouldn't even be  considering letting him move in!

hes a big boy now and needs to stand on his own two feet.

he may be you're daughters father but he's not a "DAD".

YOU OWE HIM NOTHING!!

let his new conquest help him.he's not your problem any more.

don't disrupt your daughters life for the sake of misguided loyalty to a jerk who didn't respect you or your daughter in the first place!

i hope you and your daughter enjoy life and you find someone who wants you for you and not what you can give them!!

good luck sweet heart!  

Answer 19

So if you DONT have feelings for him any more, what is your dilemma? What is making you agonise over feeling responsible for him? He is an adult, he has a girlfriend, he used you badly. If even his MUM cant stand him, then he is bad news indeed.

What EXACTLY is causing you this agony of indecision? Be sensible, now. Is he emotionally abusing you and causing you to feel guilty and responsible for him in some way?

Tell him to go to his girlfriends!!!!!! He's her problem now, you owe him nothing at all.

Oh and stop letting all these people push you around. If you made the choice to help him, your family shouldnt be giving you these ultimatums to abandon you, they are just as bad as he is for treating you like their personal slave. Suit yorself, do what you want to do and dont let him or them guilt you into it. Your responsibiltiy is your baby, only her feelings take priority over yours, not your ex's feelings or those of your family. Protect her and do the best for her. Which I suspect will be to NOT let your ex use you for a free ride like this!

Answer 20

it is really his fault to cheat on you.. helping him is not bad after all....but you should always remember that he is also ur daughters dad and u shouldn't be selfish....just help him to find a place to stay but not together with u..of course, ur family wont like that because ur ex had a mistake..for me, it was a big shame for them......just follow ur heart dear.. and good luck ^_^

Answer 21

He's playing on your emotions.

Tell him to get himself a home and hey, what on earth is he still doing sponging of his mother anyway?

Why kick your family in the teeth by taking him in when they have been so supportive of you?

Tell this man to grow up and get a life - and it isnt yours.

Byeeeeeeeeeeeee!!

Answer 22

well tell your family about the stituaution and if your family loves you and understands you then they are a true family and will support you. but if they arent then maybe get a friend you trust or work something out with one of his friends so you know hes safe and then you know you have helped him as a friend.