Please help me. I am so stressed.?

Question

I am 19 weeks pregnant and my boyfriend and I live together. He never wants to come home. He works 4 days a week from 3:30 pm to about 2 am and when he gets off work he goes to his friends house to play the playstation or to play the stupid drums... he's 25...on his days off he doesn't stay home as soon as he's out of the bed, he goes with one of his friends to God knows where. We don't have a car cuz neither of us has a license, I am driving myself crazy being at home by myself all the time... I feel he is so inconsiderate of my feelings...do you think it's cuz I'm pregnant? I try laying in the bed with him or on the couch and just watch TV for a little while but as soon as one of his stupid friends call...he's gotta go. I am so tired of crying my self to sleep over stupid stuff. I am so stressed and worried about the baby but anything I say to him is completely ignored. I am so exhausted just thinking about it. I love him so much. Please someone help me.

Answer 1

hi, im now 25weeks pregnant and im on bedrest since my 4th week so i definitely know how it feels to be left home all alone.. i wish i could tell you what to do.. but i hope to help you by speaking for myself. with the details you've given, it really sounds that your boyfriend is irresponsible and yes just like what you said, he doesnt know what to prioritize in his life- at least know what is impt. in his life right now. if i were in your place and i already tried to seriously talk to my boyfriend/husband about this issue and then nothing has changed, i would leave him.i'll write him a letter and pour out my heart to explain why i need to do this. i'd tell him that i need a healthier environment- coz being left at home all alone and feeling ignored, rejected, and not loved is a place where i'd rather not my baby experience. my pain, heartache, sadness, and emotional burden has a negative effect on the condition/growth of my baby and this has to be stopped before evrything's too late. i'd tell him that i love him very much and that the truth is i need him especially now but he has to grow up first and prove to both of us that he can be responsible enough and ready enough to be a father and a partner.

you need him now more than ever but where is he? how much more after you give birth? you definitely deserve to be loved and be cared about. motherhood is a beautiful thing. and being a parent is a noble job..i hope he realizes this too....

Answer 2

Hi......

     Due Nov. 5th with #1?   And Butt-head is bouncing around the universe with beavis??   Oh-Honey,  if I where there with you I would HUG you all night long,  this a awefull!!!!     I am so ashamed..    You need support too honey, poor girl..

Do you know what your having??     This is a serious matter one you should call social services, talk to them about what's happening..    Someone should be told what's happening so they can help you, this is important...

    It's his kid too, you should force some responsibility out of him, I feel so bad for you..    You try your hardest  to be sociable and pleasant for him and he doesn't do nothing for you to acknowledge you or support you or your feelings..    

Give him an altimateum, ok??     If he doesn't start pulling his weight, he's out!!     If he just leaves, there's your answer..

If he argues with you it just means he's scared, ok?   Don't fight back with him, I don't think he would hit a pregnant girl and risk jail-time..

     You need time to prepare for an arrival, no time for bickering and arguing..    It probably is because your pregnany, he doesn't know what to do, typical male response.

You 2 need to talk, I don't care how you do it honey, you 2 need to come clean and start figuring this out..     Figure it out together.    Un-plug the phone,  if he's got a cell, take the darn thing..      Do what you have to to get him to listen and talk to you, if not there is no hope and call the state social worker, ok?    You'll need to find a place of your own fit for a baby..

     There is help out there for you if you are on your own, your NOT alone honey..     I am here to talk to if you need someone, ok?  I will answer....    I understand your problem and will listen if needed..     Good Luck..:-))

Answer 3

First off CONGRATS!!! I am no expert but I am 14weeks pregnant and I know the emotional stress of being pregnant for the first time.Try not to be so stressed out because it is not all about you anymore...trust I know it is better said than done. Was a baby something you both have talked about in the past? Was he attentive before you were pregnant? To ME the worse thing you can do while pregnant is to sit in the house doing nothing. Is there family or friends you can be around? You should sit him down and talk about how you feel and how you think somethings that he does need to be changed. I know how it feels to be in love with someone and don't want to let go, but you have to be as stress free as you can through these months.....GOOD LUCK

Answer 4

you are stressing yourself and the baby, maybe you should take a break from each other and think about what is best for you maybe after the time apart he will realize how much you and the baby mean or maybe you will realize that you don't really want him after all.

Answer 5

I hate to say this, but your boyfriend sounds like a slacker.  I know, because I've been there.  If you think it's stressful now, wait until there is a child involved.  I think you need to give your boyfriend an ultimatum.  He needs to either step up or get out.  I know you love him, but it's time for him to grow up.  He should be there for you during your pregnancy.  His friends shouldn't be more important.

Answer 6

Hey I really feel for you. It is hard to decifer the pregnancy emotions with 'normal' feelings. I must say that i agree with the other response. If he is never at home you do have to be cautious about another woman. Im NOT saying it is but just becareful because you do not want to contract anything while you are pregnant. ALSO, it sounds like he cant deal with it and is running away but in my view you / anyone should never have to go through a pregnancy alone. Stay strong, find someone to confide in and try to talk to him. Good luck.

Answer 7

BREATH!!!!! I think those pregnacy Blues Are Kicking in Early!..Even Dough Regardless He is acting like a Fckn Prick.  Was he like this before?   Because if he wasn't Maybe He is the one getting the Pregnancy Symptoms.  Lol.   Do you have any friends to hang out with?  for the time he's not home?  Go to baby stores and shop for your baby do things that make you happy thats what i did...I had a Tuff Pregnacy.  when i tell you i cryed EVERY SINGLE DAY after my sencond month is not even a JOKE!.  My daughters dad was a complete A hole with me.  Really never knew how it felt to be spoiled by your husbandon your first pregnacy.  Maybe thats something you should be considering he doesn't seem to be very mature!   Just like my daughters dad!!..still playing Nintendo.OMGGG at first i didnt mind..but is like you running around after the baby ...tiered...cooking....while he sitting down playing nintendo....Girll..i can assure you.  You will make up your mind about him sooner or later......you'll start to realize if You Do...That you can Do Bad all by your dam self!!.... Right now you are SUPER Sensitive to everything so you have to put that first.....i feel kinda guilty now that my daughter  is a little bigger  because i think all that stress effected her development.  at her 18 month check up they told me she might need help with her speech development!....and honestly only bad thing i did was Cry my self.....to a pulp..every single day basically ...... i had no friends to turn to..and no one to tell me that Everything will be better that i had to realize that at this moment the smallest things seem bigger than what it really is..because in reality if i wasn't to be preg i would of kicked his *** out along time ago!.............hope that helped a little!!

Answer 8

well, congrats to you and your baby on the way--it sounds like you need to move on from this guy or have a serious talk with him...he is obviously afraid to face reality so he is running from it. This is life and he chose to have s*x with you and now he needs to take responsibility and be with you to support you--if he continues to chose the path he is choosing now--get rid of him, it will be best for your health during pregnancy and the best for you and your baby once he/she is born--that child is number 1 now--your boyfriend is too immature or is he maybe seeing another girl if he is never home?