Please help me with toilet training im desperate?

Question

ive a little boy who is 3 in august who also starts full time school in september.im at my witts end with potty/toilet training.

we have been trying to train him for the past 5 months i will admit ive stopped on 2 occasions thinking "hes just not ready" ive stuck to it religiously for the past 4 weeks and im getting nowhere.now im fed up and dont know what to do.(my little girl was out of nappies at 2 and it seemed easy.he will sit on his potty and grizzle ,moan and cry.the times he has taken a wee or poo i have praised him so much and given lollipops etc .then when it comes to going again its the same rigmarole.he wets or soils himself about 9 times in a day ive tryed putting him on the loo straight after and saying "ok just an accident next time ask for the loo"and then 10 mins later hes done it again.ive tryed playing games where he has to aim at things in the potty ive tryed stickers ,sweets,toys,but hes miserable and grizzly without his nappy and he goes back and for all day

Answer 1

It seems like u have tried everything. My youngest who we started potty training at 2 refused to use the potty or the toilet and we also tried everything to coax her. (My 1st was 2.5 when he was trained and my 2nd was out of nappies on her 2nd birthday)  I finally found the one thing that worked. I took her shopping and bought her some pretty knickers and when she used to soil herself she wld come crying for me to put clean knickers on her but i refused. I left her in soiled pants for hours until she got so fed up with walking round with poo in there that she started asking for the potty/toilet. Maybe this will work for u. I do sympathise as i know how frustrating it is and u're probably stuck at home most of the day and more than likely will get disapproving looks off people because yr 3 year old is still in nappies if u do take him out. Good Luck.

Answer 2

My son is very intelligent uses his potty when I put him on but getting on to 2 1/2 he will not tell me when he wants to go. He has been using his potty since 12 months. We are just stuck in this stage of "you must tell mummy when you need a wee or poo" for months. He has loads of knickers and likes to wear them but it lasts for ab out 10 minutes.

I have been told boys are slower than girls. It is not the end of the world that he is not potty trained. Once he gets to school he will soon realise that he needs to be dry but however is it a bit soon to be sending him at 3 if he still is in nappies? Can he not wait till he is 4 and HAS to go? Then you don't have to panic and let him go at his own pace.

If you are really concerned ask your health visitor.

Answer 3

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Answer 4

i had the same problem with my little girl, then someone said just put her in pants, i did that, there were a few messes for about a week,(get a good stain remover). when she realized i was not going to put nappies on her she was fine. job done in two weeks!

Answer 5

He's not ready.  You are, he is not. Some kids take longer than others.  I would take the attention off of the potty for now, and see what he does.  Be patient.  My son took longer than my daughter too.  It will be ok.

Take care..

Answer 6

It sounds as though your little boy has got himself very stressed about the potty training, just like his mum. My advice would be to give up. Boys are slower at this and although you will hear people say he should be out of nappies by now, its rubbish! They are all different and i know of children who are 4 before they are ready. I assume the school is a problem? I would give them a call and explain your worries, they will understand as they are trained to deal with this. If your son isnt ready then there isnt an awful lot you can do, when he is upset about it he just wont do it. Stop for 2 months and try again, if he still wont then stop again. I know its not what you want to hear but children dont have deadlines to do stuff like adults do, they are going on there own individual development, and as frustrating as that is for us there isnt much you can do but wait. Call and speak with his teacher, they may tell you not to worry and that when he starts school and sees other kids using the potty it will bring him on a bit.

Your kids arent little for long, its not worth causing yourself all this stress and worry. Good luck xxxx

Answer 7

Had a similar situation my son was a similar age when we started and it was h**l boys bodies do develop slower than girls its not just that girls are quicker so try not to compare.  He may really not be ready and the more pressure your putting even by being nice. First time we tried he peed on the carpet 10 times (we have since changed the carpet).   Have you spoke to your Health Visitor as he may have a physical problem and they will be able to help. You still have plenty of time so do stick with it it is easier when the weather is better as you can let him play outside without the worry.

Answer 8

ok i think you need to buy some real cool pants in his favorite charactor.. all children are different some like to go straight onto the toilet others like a potty,other like pull up pants you need to see which he likes.ask him..or just test them all out.. get him to wear his pants and make  abig deal of it telling him he is a really big boy etc... as you have been praising him keep it up... maybe stickers would work?  maybe he can go shopping and pick pants with you? hope this helps..mine have all done it different ..i prefer the toilet method which most or mine prefered too...

Answer 9

Well I always heard kids will go when there ready and if you try to force him it will take longer.. take him to the bathroom when you go.. that might help? GOOD LUCk

Answer 10

I have every sympathy - potty training my twins was probably the scariest thing I had to do!!  We started by taking them to the shops and letting them choose some really pretty panties (cheapest possible!!)  Then we set a date (for a Monday) and told them them wouldn't be having nappies/pull-ups any more but would be having their panties on.  If they soiled their panties (urine) I would show them how they had wet their pretty panties (poor panties its not nice for them being wee'd on, etc) and try to encourage them to ask for the potty instead.  If they did the other then we would make an even bigger deal of the poor panties and would throw them away (although as we started getting short of pants I would clean them!!).  

They soon realised that they were losing their pretty panties and started making more of an effort.  Within 3/4 weeks we had got down to one accident a week.  Within 3 months they were dry at night too.

I appreciate that you may have tried all these but it really is worth persevering.  The girls have a little boy who is 4 and a half at their pre-school and he has only just cracked being dry during the day - but is still in nappies at night.

Good luck and I'll be thinking of you X

Answer 11

http://children.webmd.com/tc/toilet-trai...

I went to Web MD and found this, some of the ideas on there may help you.

I am going through the same thing, my son will be 3 in July, he has no interest in going. I did read that and got some good ideas. Yesterday was his first day of being DRY!!!  I put on a pair of big boy underware and told him that he had to use the potty, He asked for a pull up and I said NO!!! Does your son know when he's going? Does he hide or get really quite when he's having a bowl movement? Them are good signs that he's ready to be trained? All children are different and just don't push your son....one day he'll suprise you.

Answer 12

I know this may be hard but you have to be patient.  When i was potty training my son, I would ask him every 30 minutes if he has to go potty.  Even if he told me no, I would still put him on the potty and ask him to try to go potty.  

It is also summer time let him set in his wet diaper in the heat and i am sure he is not going to like it.  I potty trained my son when he was 14 months old.  It was during the summer and he hated the feeling of a wet diaper.

Try to be patient and remind your child to go potty.

Answer 13

I also have a 3year old I always sent him to the potty with his dad or brothers and that seemed to work he hasn't potted on his self at all! I also have a 7 year old and he has potty issues also he has ADHD,and he has seizers but he is a smart kid and I usually have to put him on the potty and leave him there for a couple hours a day at a tme that usually works! Or if that doesnt work I have told him that if he potties on himself that I would put his underwear on his head and put him outside so everybody could see him of course I would never do that but it worked he hasn"t potted on himself in six months