Please help with this MIL/Grandparent question!?

Question

My MIL keps our 2yr old 2 xs a wk for 4-5 hours.Yesterday she made a comment to my hubby who told me later. At 1st it ddn't bother me becz tht's her opinion, but then i found out she said it in front of our daughter, then I was upset. It seems small an maybe it is, but i just asked if she would refrain from saying competitive things or the likes in front of my "repeating" 2yr old. My daughter had pointed out the letter "A" on tv and my proud MIL said "I taught her that". DH said yeah an jus shared w/her the things i teach her. Well MIL then said "yes, Mommy an GrandMommy teach her things, but GrandMommy teachers her more things than Mommy". I felt if she believed that, that was her rite, but saying it in front of my daughter i did not lik. So hubby called to let her no and afta a heated argument she finally admitted that she believes she does teach our 2yr old more than me (Im a preg stay-at-home-Mom and theres no way) an i said she could never teach her more than me bcz i have more time to teach her. She said dont bring our 2yr old bac hung up. Were we wrong? I have always thanked MIL with cards and just saying it with her helpin out while I'm pregnant an I thank my own Mom as well. But even tho my MIL is proud of what she has taught our 2yr old and even tho I don't think hubby should always say what I do when his Mom is gloating, I just felt she should not say things like that in front of my daughter. I was hopin even if MIL didn't agree that she would respect our wishes. Even tho MIL is a proud grandparent, I just wish she would also understand that as new parents, we are also proud too. And we r still new at this and do not know everything. Were we wrong? We didnt expect her and my FIL to say dont bring her back. Now hubby is angry an is like fine. And jus so u no, my hubby an i share everything in case sum people say he shouldn't hav tld me. but when MIL made the comment he tld his Mom rite then an there, "No u don't, my wife teaches her more than anyone". I didn't no teachin my daughter was a competition, I was just thankful for the help, but i just didnt lik her sayin it in front of my daughter. Jus need a way to settle this.

Answer 1

what can u possibly teach your daughter if u re illiterate yourself? i mean shame on u woman, how can an adult write such a gibberish. do u have any idea about english grammar and spelling? it is good you have an educated mil. or is she?

Answer 2

They will get hungry to see the kid.

Get your husband to apologize if possible. This blow-up only serves to deprive you of a much-needed resource... tell him that

.

You two take the MIL & FIL out to dinner sometime after they have cooled down. You just behave as if nothing happened.

Allow the grandparents the privilege, however bloated and contentious, of bragging. Let them think whatever they want, as long as they don't teach the kids any cusswords or feed her alcohol.

This is all ego-based stuff. It doesn't matter at all.

The kid will only know any difference if she is deprived of her grandparents.

Time to get real.

Answer 3

If you're that educated then you ought to know that how you present yourself is how you're going to be judged.  And as your text is all the representation we get of you on here...

It seems to me that you and your husband sort of took a mole hill and made it into one heck of a mountain.  If, as you said, your husband told his mom that you taught your daughter more than anyone ("but when MIL made the comment he tld his Mom rite then an there, "No u don't, my wife teaches her more than anyone") it would seem to me that the situation had already been addressed.  As much as the comment would have upset me once it was related to me my concerns would have been more about how much time I *wanted* my daughter exposed to that attitude rather than fighting it out with his mom over who taught the kid more.  You and your husband took what was a minor conflict and turned it into the true pissing match it turned into.