Please read my poetry?

Question

My emotions rests inside the coffin

I cant figure out how to be loving

I want it back but i cant get it back

Only your love can open the lid on the coffin

Hurry cause its already burning

Hurry before it just stops working

Stop the fire that these liars ignited

It hurts, It burns heal me from this painful heartache

Just tell me that you love me

Ill tell you that your lovely

Just hold my hands and hug me

exactly you do to puppys

Answer 1

That is beautiful! I write poems too.

Answer 2

Not bad. The only problems are your metaphors. They're a bit vague and your vocabulary is a little shallow. Try to be more artistic. Poetry should take you to another world and evoke your emotions.

First line, Its "my emotions rest..." not rests.

and I'm not sure about Your last line. It certainly doesn't sound poetic.

If you want to improve, you should be ready for some honest critique. I'm not trying to be mean here, but to help you improve.

Good luck.

Lulleh SS

Answer 3

that's so beautiful and whoever the person that you have feelings for should know about how you feel ^_^

Answer 4

Lovely !!

Answer 5

amaizng

Answer 6

That is Really good! Are you a poetry Writer?

Answer 7

can i copy thaaaaaaat your so good ........ please

Answer 8

pooooooooooooooooooooo

Answer 9

It seems pretty good. The only thing I could say is wrong with it, is all the metaphors are kind of unexplained like the coffin seems to be burning? and you need whoever ( your love interest?) to put out the fire by them telling you they love you? That's how I interpreted it.