Please share your opinions about my poem. It's called "A Serpent's Labyrinth". Thanks!?

Question

Wandering through the ruins of the past

Hope is gone, nothing left even a dust

Tears fell as I gaze upon the grey skies

Had enough to roll another dice

Never thought this will hurt me so much

Should I suffer for giving all my trust?

So you betrayed me, as you always did

Feed me more apathy, then watch me bleed

The words we whispered in the ears of the lords

Just lingered at the walls of dark corridors

I've searched for a bag of love and conscience

But I got enslaved behind your cold fences

Playing blind to those s***s you put me through

Scenes of vituperation for me's not new

I've let my neck strangled and learned how to take

Yet in the end, you're the one who turned to snake

Now, unwrap me from your cruel fingers

Who anguish souls for its own desires

Let me go out of this mist-filled labyrinth

So that I will learn again how to breathe

Answer 1

That's well written. But do one thing. Take away the word 's***s'. That does not belong to a book of english poetry. The rest is all fine and well packed. While writing, fury, anger, and emotions like sorrow and joy may suffocate us for words, but you should not be enslaved to put in vulgar tongues. Poems are a shower of words...be careful!