Please tell me what more I might expect, and when end of life might be when you read details below. ?

Question

My mother has end-stage emphysema; c.o.p.d. It's been a bit longer than the approx. 5 yrs. her Dr. said in his opinion, she'd have to live if she'd quit smoking. She still smokes. She's on 3 liters of oxygen, 24/7. I have just recently seen a significant change in her over-all health. I have noticed that my mother is displaying additional symptoms now. She cannot walk any length of distance without gasping for breath. Her pulse-ox is between 85-89 at rest, and her pulse rate is high. She used to have a productive cough, but now it's almost non-productive.(My mother is my life...she is everything to me. She is my best friend, companion, and the only family I have left)! Without her I cannot see myself, and GOD KNOWS that I would trade places with her, without hesitation! PLEASE TELL ME what more I might expect, and what signs I should look for when it's close to the end of life. I am her sole caretaker, so it goes without saying that I see everything. I apologize for my emotions. Sincerely, Cecilia's son, Alec.

Answer 1

Bless you honey. My husbands mom has it too, sometimes it seems like shes better. And then the next day she can't even get out of bed. I honestly don"t know what to tell you to expect. I will pray for you and your mom.

Answer 2

Alec-

My prayers are not only for your mother but even more for you.  The fact that she still smokes while knowing she has end-stage emphysema means either that her addiction to smoking is so great she cannot bring herself to stop,,...or maybe she has decided she does not wish to continue to live any longer.  We all know that if she lits up while the oxygen is running, a major explosion will be the end for anyone in her room.  Despite your great need and love for her, I know from my own experience as a medical professional, that it is emotionally frustrating and an awful feeling not to have your offer to help receive a positive response from your mom.  

As she smokes, her emphysema will increase and more lung will not work, she will be able to bring less and less oxygen to her brain and other body parts, and she may likely develop lung infection (pneumonia) as she quietly passes away and dies.  You sadly cannot help the ones you love most if they will not or cannot accept your help.  Just continue to share your presence and love with her as best you can and accept the fact you did all you could.  Let your memories of her be of better health days that you enjoyed together.