Please tell me what you think of these lyrics...?

Question

Okay, I just wrote this. Not too harsh please. Please out of 10, rate it... thanks

Molly’s Daughter

Molly had a daughter

On the 11th of July

And she vowed to her daughter Kelly

That each year she would sing a lullaby

It was a tune that Molly’s mother sang to her

The song that she would sing to her daughter

Kelly grew into a child and played

Each and every day

She would return with a lily for her mother

Molly kept her promise to her beloved child

She sang her that lullaby every little while

And it was only them and no other

Molly and Kelly had a bond

That no one could break

Kelly grew into a teenager quickly

And then their common ground started to shake

Kelly would cry in her room

And Molly would pray that it would end soon

She was suddenly an enemy

To her own daughter Kelly

In Kelly’s eyes, anyways

Kelly wanted to find herself

Without her mothers’ help

That’s why she acted this way

Kelly grew into an adult

And she grew up fast

But her mother got ill

And Kelly apologised for the past

She held her mothers hand

And gently hummed looking over their land

Molly got old and was indeed

Tired and sick and the help that she needed

Was her daughter by her side

Kelly cried and begged forgiveness

And quit her job at a candy business

But Molly had to go and died

Kelly got married and had children

And finally felt like she belonged

But she still missed her mother

But to her daughter, she sang that very same song

The same tune that Kelly’s mother sang to her

As a loving tribute from a daughter to her mother

Answer 1

Thats good 7/10

Answer 2

Personaly, I Like it but others wont as they may be into other music types such as r&b or pop . i think that counts as blues.

it depends what music they like :)

Answer 3

Yeah, really quite good.  I like it :) 8/10

Answer 4

it's not bad...sounds very 'cats in the cradle-esque'. sounds like a country song. 6.5-7/10...you repeat yourself a lot...in a different way, and the rhymes are very simple. keep working on it. :)

Answer 5

6/10

Like i thought it was really good,

and something many girls can relate to too,

but the last 3 pharagraphs need some work.

like try rephrase 'but molly had to go and died'

stuff like that,

it's abit extreme to put in such a short sentence, i think !

but well done,

it was really nice to read :]

xx

Answer 6

good song, would love to hear it in like a 'thnks fr th mmrs' tune

Answer 7

Poor Kelly! Nice lyrics tho. I'd give u 8/10

Answer 8

sad but pretty.  I would probably shed a tear if I heard it on the radio. It would help it hear the tune.  Good luck with it.  Hope its not true.