Plz help with this problem

Question

Okay, so I am stuck with a dilemma. My sister in law decided to do her wedding in another country. And my husband and I have 2 children. At the time for the wedding they will be 1 and 2.

I am really stressing the flight with the kids because its a long flight.

Also we will all be staying at a relatives home and I don't think that is enough room for us.

My in laws offered to pay for the tickets which is nice.

Ever since I met my husband my in laws used to bug me to lose weight and at the time i was a size 12/14 and I was happy with the way I looked. After having my kids I gained a little weight but I am not unhappy with how I look.

For the past 4 yrs they haven't stopped saying something about my weight. And now I feel pressured to become really skinny for this wedding because I feel like they are ashamed of how I look and they are very health conscious.

I feel like if I don't lose the weight, then when I go to this wedding my husbands family will just be talking about me and I know I will hear "you should lose weight"

I told my husband to just go alone for his sisters wedding but he doesn't want to go alone.

My in laws insist that we have to go.

I really dont' want to go because I know I won't have fun and my in laws will get in our business so much. And I won't be comfortable staying at his relatives house with my in laws.

So i really don't know what to do.

I feel like I have to go just for my husband, but yet I don't want to go because of all this stress and pressure.

Answer 1

Wow... first of all, where is your man when they are bugging you about your weight?! He should be the one telling them to leave you alone! He should be the one standing up for you!

Girlfriend! Don't care about what other people say! If you are going to loose weight, it should be because you want to be more healthy, not look more skinny. No matter what size you are, it will always be YOU. The size of your body does not determine whether you are a good or bad person.

I really don't recommend telling your husband to go alone. Girl, he doesn't want to be alone! He wants to be with you! He wants to share this special moment with you.

If his family has enough gutts to tell you that you need to loose weight, then you need to grow some balls and talk to them. Tell them that it doesn't make you feel good when they tell you that. That if you are going to agree to travel with your husband and kids, then they should lay off of you.

I had to tell my dad the same thing. He has been bugging be to be the "right" size since I can remember. (I was a size 9/10) After I had my monkeys, I am now a size 13/16. Well, everytime he saw me he would be like, "Gotta cut down on the doughnuts!" or "wow! you could be a wrestler" It hurt, i told him many times, but he wouldn't stop. So one day, I told him, "I know I'm not the size I used to be, but it doesn't matter, I'm a good mom and a good wife. If you have a problem with the way I look, the it's your problem not mine. If you ever tell me something hurtful about my weight again, it will be the last time I come to visit."

That was the last time he said anything about my weight....