Plz revise the short paragraph to flow?

Question

The Beijing Olympic has the potential of improving the quality of people’s lives throughout China. The tremendous amount of money being spent by tourists at Chinese restaurants, hotels, and ticket counters helps to boost the overall Chinese economy. Additionally, many Chinese employees earn greater wages due to increased demand of Chinese products and services. Employers will surely need to fulfill the demand set by an increase in consumerism. An increase in Chinese tourism as a result of the Beijing Olympic Games will help better the quality of life for Chinese citizens who may otherwise suffer from hunger or deprivation of basic needs. Furthermore, the Chinese will be able to spend leisure time with their families during the weekend without concern for the next day's work and salary. Finally, the Chinese people are proud of their country and the athletes who successfully performed for the world. The Chinese people feel patriotism for their country and are happy about being born in China. The Olympic Games have managed to blend many ethnic groups into one united China.

Answer 1

That is one long paragraph! There are only some minor changes that I can suggest...

For the sentence "Finally, the Chinese people are proud of their country and the athletes who successfully performed for the world.", delete "Finally", because although it is used as a transition word, it reads as "the Chinese are finally proud of their country", like they weren't proud of it before.

"The Chinese people feel patriotism for their country..." -- Take out any unnecessary phrases/words. Someone who is patriotic is obviously patriotic to their country. Simple wording is effective. You should somehow break apart this sentence and slide your meanings into the other sentences.

"...and are happy about being born in China." -- This part is too general. I don't think we have a choice of where we are born! It is not a good phrase to put at the end of the paragraph, where the strongest opinions should be stated.