Pregnancy and Father-in-law!?!?!?

Question

I just found out that I am five weeks pregnant, and I really really want to do the right thing for my baby from now till its grown well my father in law has a slight drinking problem, and Is always stockin MY refrigerator with beer.I've asked him numerous times to just take the case home with him..but nope!I've even gone so far as to give him an ENTIRE SHELF in my frig,but as soon as I TAKE THE BEER OUT F THE CASE AND PUT THEM IN THE FRIG(keep in mind I do not drink any of this beer) He just goes and buys another and sticks the whole dang case in the frig blocking all of my food.it's driving me crazy and away from him, I feel like he has no respet for me,my home, and most importantly my unborn child, what do I do I don't want to cause any problems but I do NOT want it in my house.Do I just ban alcohol from my house or what?Please any help would be wonderful...for everyone involved in my household!

Thanks

Answer 1

Its YOUR house, therefore everyone must abide by YOUR rules. Make your father-in-law buy his own mini-fridge and put it in the garage. (if you have one.) or just ban alcohol all together. you have to put your foot down if you really want something to happen.

Answer 2

You are definitely making a big deal out of nothing.  Is this the biggest problem in your life?  

When he leaves, put his beer on the back porch.  It will be warm the next time he comes over.  But I think you are causing trouble over nothing.  Beer in the fridge does not, in any way, harm your unborn child. That is crazy.

Answer 3

Tell him to put the beer in his fridge.  You should ban it from your house.  Tell him it for the baby's sake.  If worst comes to worst, you can always just take the beers out and throw them away.    

Answer 4

Why this is an issue I don't know does your father in law belong in your house? where is the husband does he drink also? perhaps you could get a separate fridge for beer I always have one in the garage.

Answer 5

Your father in law has no right to store things at your home so tell him to bugger off.  Is he storing it at your place to hide it from his wife or something? Tell him straight that its not his home and you dont want his beer taking up space in your fridge.

Answer 6

Your house - your rules!

Why is your FIL over at your house so often anyway?

Answer 7

What the problem, why can't he keep the beer in your fridge?  

Tell him to buy a little fridge to keep his beer in and you need the big fridge for food.  If he won't share nice (and you must share nice too) tell his son.  If neither of them help you, leave.  your and your baby would be better off elsewhewre.  

Answer 8

I am sure it must be frustrating for you to have him come into your house and just kinda take over.

My fiance has what I consider to be a slight drinking problem too. I don't mind a bottle of wine with a nice dinner or to have a few drinks on a weekend, but he needed to have about three beers everyday after work to "unwind" and at first I didn't see a problem with that. I started to see it as a problem when I noticed that he was extremely irritable if he didn't get to have those beers after work.

I told him I thought he had a problem, which he initially laughed off saying that he didn't get drunk, it was just to loosen up. I ended up kind of lucking out, because he got a DUI. In doing so, he was ordered to go to therapy. His therapist told him that I was right and he shouldn't need the beer to loosen up after work and it was in fact a chemical dependency.

The therapist suggested Valerian tea, which has the same calming effect of alcohol. It worked great. He brews some of that after work every night, and it helps him relax in a more healthy way. I even have some every once in a while (it's great with honey)

Maybe tell your father in law that you would prefer not to have alcohol in your house on a regular basis and say that you will buy it when there are times that you do see as an exception.

Make him some of that tea and see if he likes it. I was totally skeptical when it was suggested for Joe, I didn't think he would even give it a chance, but he did and really likes it.

You may be able to gain some respect from him for standing up for yourself and your new baby, and possibly even by giving him an alternative to drinking so much.

Hope it helps!

~Jess  

Answer 9

Okay your going to get mad but dear your only 5 weeks pregnant so the excuse with the child is just that an excuse. Don't use the child as a weapon in this war.

When your father in law does come over and puts his beer in the fridge take it out if you don't want it there. ask that he not bring so much with him as there isn't room.

Or you could just be honest and say Dude Your a drunk and I may have married your son but that does not give you a right to take over my house and do what you want here. Take your beer and head out.

Good Luck Lisa

Answer 10

Why does your father in law get in say of what you put in your refrigerator anyways. You put what you want to put in there and if you don't want beer in there then it shouldn't be there.  What does your husband have to say about this?  I think you need to just ban it if that's what it takes.  He doesn't live with you right?  So, it shouldn't matter if there is beer in your refrigerator or not.  

Answer 11

where is your husband in this picture? if it bothers you so much why don't you ask your husband to talk to his father? if he can't do that there is something wrong with your relationship with your husband. be very wary if your husband can't get his dad out of the picture. but, if this is the only thing your father-in-law does that bothers you and otherwise your relationship is good maybe you should just let go and let the guy take some space in your fridge. if he is really an alcoholc sooner or later the problem will catch up with him and he will have to deal with it.

Answer 12

Why don't you have a chat with both your husband and your FIL about it? I'm sure they'd wanna work things through since you're pregnant.