Pregnant, and I don't like my boyfriend's last name?

Question

I don't like the way it sounds with either my name or the baby name we have picked out. We decided since we are not married that the baby will have my last name, and when we get married (which we've already discussed) both the baby and I will take his name together. I don't even know if I want to though, lol. Is that okay? Also, do you think his parents will be offended that I am using my last name for the baby (on the birth certificate and everything)...they've done a lot for us during this pregnancy (as have my parents).

Answer 1

You sound very immature.

If you unconditionally love your boyfriend you wouldn't care what his last name is. If you guys are getting married anyways why even bother having your child take your last name??

It kinda seems to me like your not serious about this relationship.

Answer 2

I don't think there is anything wrong with that. Sure, traditionally the wife and children take the man's last name but there's no real reason for that other than tradition. You can keep your name, use both, he can take yours, or you can pick a new one together and use it instead of either one! Do whatever makes you both happy. Don't worry about what other people think. Best of luck with the little one.

Answer 3

hi i know a girl that is married and her daughter uses her mothers maiden name and thats grand no one takes any notice my married name is not as nice as my maiden name either but i uae my married name there are a lot of double barled names out there say Ann smith jones and woild be called Ann smith so i wouldnt worry

Answer 4

Good heaven! The answerers are immature not you! It is your child. The grandparents will get over it. You could give your kids ANY last name you want, it doesn't even have to be either of yours. He won't have to adopt his own child, just make sure is name is in the fathers section on the birth certificate. I think it is cool about you both taking it when you get married it is like saying he is taking you both. :) a friend of mine had a similar situation, and she is 30 by the way, and she hyphenated her boys name using them both.

Good luck!!

Answer 5

well u know the babby dont have to have the same lastname. if u marry him it will but it can have ur last name.

Answer 6

maybe you  could talk to him about it, and both pick out a new, neutral last name together, and both change your last name to a name that fits both of your names, as well as the baby name. :]

Answer 7

Well, you are being immature. What's so wrong with your baby having his last name? Maybe he thinks YOUR last name is stupid. I would be offended. You just have to deal with it. Grow up. And WHY would you want to WAIT until you got married?? Why wait if that's what it's going to come down to? That's so stupid.

PLUS FIRST GLANCE makes it look like that baby isn't his because MOST kids have thier dads name unless daddy aint in thier life...He's going to have fun explaining that mommy is a stuck up b*tch that wouldn't let him have his fathers name bc it "sounds funny"....Nice mom.

Answer 8

If you plan on changing it anyway you should just go with it.  It will cost you money to change the baby's name.  You could also hyphenate the last name with yours and your bfs.

Answer 9

If you plan on changing it some day then you might as well give your baby his last name now so you don't have to pay to do it later. He can still sign the birth certificate and "claim" the baby without the baby having his last name. Its whatever you and the father decide to do, don't let other people bother you. Its your baby and you need to do what you think is right.

Answer 10

I think you should just use his last name. Ofcourse it would sound weird at first, but it just takes time to get used to.

Answer 11

You don't have to take his last name, even after you get married. It's fine to be married and have different last names, hyphenated names, or he could even take your last name. If you are planning on taking his last name eventually then you may want to consider giving your baby his last name to start with, it will be less to change later and less confusing for your child, especially if you don't get married till they start school (you didn't say how long you were going to wait). Don't worry about what his parents think, they should still be happy that it is their grandchild no matter what, if you want to try to make them happy then you could give your baby the middle name of someone in your boyfriends family.

Answer 12

Ignore the rude answers. I was the same way before my husband and I were married. I liked my last name way more than his, his was so common and boring! I suggested him taking my last name too, but he didn't like that idea. When we got married I took his last name, and when my son was born, we gave him my husbands last name as well. Some things to think about is that it is hard enough having to change your name after you get married (social security, bank, drivers license...) it is going to be even harder to have to change your baby's name as well. When your baby is born, give him/her the name he's going to have permanently, it'll just be easier in the long run. Just try to take your boyfriends feelings in to consideration (which I am sure you have) But in my case, my husband said he always dreamed about giving his name to me and how that was what he wanted and that meant more that me just not liking his name obviously...Do what you both you and your boyfriend are comfortable with. It's sweet to care what his parents will think, but it really doesn't have anything to do with them, and they will love your baby regardless of his/her last name.

Have you considered hyphenating his/her name?

Like Smith-Jones

Or having your last name be the middle name, or the other way around....

Just some thoughts!

Good luck!

Answer 13

that is terrible...and why would you have a baby with someone you would never want to marry because of their LAST NAME?? and also I bet your pretty young because you seem very immature.good luck to you.

Answer 14

maybe hifin the babys last name, meaning give it both of your last names like Jonathan michael yourlastname-hislastname

i know the name i picked is long lol. then when you get married just take off your last name and his will still be there.

some ppl are rude and think your baby will only be loved by the ppl with the babys same last name, which isnt true at all!!  choose whatever last name you think and i know you baby will be loved no matter the last name!!  good luck on deciding.

im naming my baby boy Ethan David Adams!!  but we are married so its a different story. we are giving our baby his daddys middle name too.

Answer 15

Its just a last name but i can understand your position. There are tons of girls out there who don't take their husband's name for one reason or another. An option to be able to include his name, and his family is to use a hyphen, example: yours-his. Whatever the 2 of you decide is between the 2 of you and nobody else's business. It isn't going to make you a better person if you take his name and its not going to make you a horrible one. Bottom line is that it is just a name it doesn't make or break a person! Good luck and congrats on the baby. Oh and no he will not have to adopt to baby if his name is on the birth certificate!!!

Answer 16

I think you should use your last name. You're the one that's been carrying the baby all this time. When you get married you can change the baby's name but until you two can make that commitment keep yours.

The parents should be understanding, especially since your boyfriend agreed with you about it. It's not their baby anyway.

And as long as you put him on the birth certificate he won't have to adopt the baby later. Putting him on it doesn't mean he has to have the same last name.

Answer 17

He got you pregnant without marrying you. So, the ball is in your court. If you don't want you and your baby to have his last name...stick with yours.

Answer 18

i sort of agree with holly's girl<3 but in a way thats not cool because when yall do get married and everything then its goin to be his last name anyways and ur last name dont really matter plus when yall do get married and have to change the babys last name ur goin to have to go throw all that stupid stuff and lots of money so he can adopt him because thats what all that is so why dont u go ahead and do it know so u r not losin any money later on in the long run and show some appriciation to ur boyfriend and his parents so ya thats my idea but whatever u can choose just let us know what u do!!!!!!!

Answer 19

If you are planning to get married anyway, then your baby should be given their father's last name. I didn't like my husband's last name either, but we used it (in fact, I still use it even though we're divorced for the children's sake). Or if you want the baby to have your last name, then talk it's father into taking your last name when you get married. Or you could even make up a last name for the three of you when you get married.