Pregnant, unmarried adult afraid to tell parents!?

Question

I am 27 years old, and just found out that I am pregnant. I am in a long term relationship, have lived on my own since I was 21, have a job, house, car, etc, but I am terrified to tell my parents, and I don't know why I am so scared. If I were married, they would be elated, but they can sometimes be extremely traditional, and I don't know how they will react. I feel silly being so afraid, as I am close to 30, but I can't bring myself to tell them. Does anyone have any advice on how best to go about this? Thank you!

Answer 1

They're going to find out in the next few months anyway.  Just let your body do the talking and when they ask if you are just look at them like they are stupid and say "Well yeah!"

Answer 2

I am in a very similar position. 21 weeks pregnant, not married and have been on my own since high school. My boyfriend and I took my parents out to eat and told them. Your obviously independent and  strong enough to handle this, regardless of your marital status. Just remind them of that and all your accomplishments. I have never felt a baby is a reason to get married, and I wouldn't rush it just to make them happy or 'okay with things'. It's your life. Remember their reaction at first may not be easy but in the end it will be okay.

Answer 3

god your lucky you got to 27 i found out late that i was pregnant i was 19when i fell pregnant and only a month after turning 20 did i find out.  my parents were the last ones to find out that i was pregnant and i totaly regretted not telling them earlier. they would be abosutly thrilled to get the news belived me. i thought my mum was going to well get angry and all that but never did she kissed me on the check and hugged dad. was even more of a thrill when i took my dad and my younger sister to our first ultrasound to find out that i was just under 28 weeks pregnany. Tell you parents what can they do your an Adult.

Answer 4

I was 17 when I got pregnant, now am 24 and married to my son's father.  My parents are very traditional, religious.  My dad is a preacher/pastor of a little church we attend.  My parents went off the deep end, but they still loved me and the child that I gave birth to.  They will have a hard time with it, but trust me, nothing will warm the heart like a grandchild!  I promise!  The first time they see it move, or hear the heartbeat, their hearts will melt!  I thought my dad would die, but he got over it later on.  He didn't speak to me or the baby's daddy until almost time for me to give birth.  Now, Papaw wouldn't take anything for his baby!  Good Luck!  Hope I helped!

Answer 5

I would send a letter, so that they can digest the info first.

Or you could lay it on them, and let them know that you'll call them back later to discuss it.

Answer 6

Hi,

I think parents often act the way they do out of worry for their children, and it doesnt get less as their kids grow up! The best thing you can do is go to them prepared!!! Explain everything to them clearly, show them that you sre coping really well and that you feel able to do this. Show them how independant and together you can be and they will feel less worried for you. They love you and it may take time, but they will stop thinking about the fact you aren't married and start looking forward to their grandchild. Take your partner with you so they can see you as a supportive familt unit. Good luck!!

Answer 7

Sarah.. you are 27 years old.. adult up babe!  Go have a sit down.. and for goodness sakes take your man with you!  Tell them your plans even if it is not to get married but include them in everything and be prepared to answer all questions!

Answer 8

well you just have to tell them sometime. . . . but it wud be better if you tell them sooner. . they are your parents, they will always be there for you no matter what, you can also tell them together with the father of ur baby. . . that wud make it easier. . . ur parents may have some reaction or not but they will still love you. . .  

Answer 9

you are 27 not 17. whats the big deal. just tell them. my daughter was 21, out on her own  with a boy friend of 4 years when she told dad and i she was pregnant. i was so not happy and told her so and was not nice about the way i told her. i thought her dad would be the one most upset about this and was waiting for me to have my say then he was really going to go off on her and the boy friend.. after about an hour of my ranting her dad finally said "o.k you made your point , enough is a enough. he gave her a big hug and said,  honey you will make a great mom. it took me about 3 days but then i couldn't wait. the day my T.K. (Victoria Kaye) was born i was the proudest grand-mom .i just could not wait to show her off.  shes 11 now and i still love showing her off.  now my baby is the mom of 6 (4 boys,2 girls) and guess what? her dad was right she is a GREAT MOM.  if i was you i would just tell them a.s.a.p. if they do get up set just let them have their say on this and then give them a few days to get use to it and I'm sure just as i did they will  get excited about the new baby. i hope this helps.

Answer 10

I got pregnant with my first child at 20, I was in the same boat as you...in a long-term relationship and not married. From my point of view I just figiured grant it my parents may or may not be pissed, I told them out of respect for them and myself. Because I figured that in the long run they would respect me more for telling them instead of them being the last to know. Plus, with you being pregnant you don't need the extra stress, it's already a nerve wrecking experience. Ecspecially with this being your first. All in all you don't know how they will react until you tell them...so I would just give them the benefit of the doubt and tell them. Who knows theymay be extremely excited. Congatulations on your pregnancy and Good Luck!

Answer 11

I totally hear what you are saying but it sounds like you are in a great position. Your parents will quickly swallow their pride and realize how close this baby will bring you and your family together. It is 2008 and you are a responsible woman. I give you credit for keeping the baby.

I'd go out to dinner and at dessert/coffee hand them a card with either the ultra sound or something along the line of "grandparents". They'll quickly get over the shock and fast forward to excitement. Also, share your plans (where do we go from here)...the more they think you are prepared the less they'll worry.

PS--27 is FAR away from 30...ekkk!

Answer 12

your parents must be really "religious".

you are just going to have to tell them. take them to dinner and tell them nice and easy.

will they still make comments. YES. will they still give you that sunday school lesson about fornication, and having babies out of wedlock is detramental to your road to heaven. YES!!

and it feels like you are struggling, they will always ask you about what the father is doing, where is he at? ALL THE TIME.

but once the little angel is born, they will spoil him or her rotten. trust me, I have been there.

you are just having a moral and ethical battle within yourself, because of you religious upbringing. but you are a big girl, now (lol). you can always go to your apartment and close the door (lol).

however, your mom is going to be there. she may even seem like she is going to take over because you know it is no longer your pregnancy, it is her's too.

Answer 13

Getting married seemed like a good idea - being married (eloped) none traditionally is better than being pregnant non-traditionally - atleast to the old folks.  Right?  Then you can lay it on them that your married and pregnant and they'de both have very well rounded heart attacks - but they'de pass happy.

Answer 14

Get married :-)

Answer 15

boo hoo they'll have to get over it..why do you let your parents run YOUR LIFE.you've been classified as an adult for nine years now..it has nothing to do with them unless they want to be supportive and help you out