Pregnant at 17?? HELP!!?

Question

so i just found out that im pregnant yesterday and it sucks.. and yes im keeping the baby and no im not gonna abort it.. but im really concerend about what life would be like AFTER the baby's born.. the guy thought i could trust and love left me and Im curious to know how many guys out there exacally would actually date a girl knowing she has a child.. what would you think??

Im not the kind of girl whos dependent on a guy but i want to have a life of my own.. not sit all day caring for this stupid baby that i never even wanted..

omg help im miserable and depressed!!! no one even knows that im preg except for my friend.. not even my twin sister knows..

im gonna need all the advise i can get..

Answer 1

Well datz a very stressful situation 2 B N and datz cool you already made your decisions u just need to relax.. things will get better and when some1 really likes u they will try to be there anyway baby or not... it just makes it alil bit harder for the other person...... well it really depends on ur situation and how u handle urself and ur situation aand don't give up on loveee girl love your baby!! And urself  okayy  love will come to u even wit the baby ur smart and ur pretty just don't be such a ***** be a nice girl  lol yea u would be just take care of yourself

Answer 2

First off. Don't call YOUR baby stupid. Because your're calling yourself stupid. The baby is innocent.

Answer 3

Wow this sound exactly like me!!! I had my daughter at 16 and her father left me when i was 5 months pregnant. I found out he was really 22 and already had a child. I had my daughter cause i didnt want to abort her. My mother helped me a lot but i also got on food stamps, wic and medical. I met a good man when my daughter was 5 months old. He ended up raising my daughter as his own. We had another baby and now were engaged. Im only 20 and my daughter is gonna be 3. Im in college and have my own apartment with my fiance. Anything is possible, look at what happend with me. People used to always say my life was gonna be ruined but i just ignored them and kept my head up. MY daughters real father still hasnt seen her and i dont even care anymore, Just stay strong momma! Its gonna be hard at times but you can do it. God bless u

ok i just saw that you called your baby stupid. That really messed up! I spent alomst 10 mins trying to encourage you cause i know what your going threw then i see that and in made my stomach turn. Your baby is not stupid! it didnt ask to be born and if you didnt want it you should have used a condom!!!! i had my daughter young but never blamed her cause it was MY FAULT!!!!!!

Answer 4

Well first I am a single mom of a 14 going on 15 year old and I was 17 also when I was pregnant I was very scared and felt my life was over and all kinds of crazy thoughts were going through my head too but it gets "interesting" Parenting is never easy never the thing is everything happens for a reason and you will get through this tell your family and yea they may be upset or whatever but just make sure this is your only child until you are ready and married to have another.I myself only have her and only her BTW she is spoiled JK but finish school there are so many programs out there so take advantage of them I did and went to college got a great paying job and it feels great when my daughters friends mistake me for her older sister. Just for now stay calm and make sure you take care of yourself and your baby.

Answer 5

first of all hon worrying about if guys will like you with a kid is NOT your top priority.  figuring out what to do with your life and your baby's life is #1 right now.  if you really feel like you can't take care of a baby (or even if you don't want to yet) and you know you won't have an abortion, then i would consider putting the baby up for adoption.  you can have a completely closed adoption, with no contact at all, or you can have an open adoption where you can still be a part of the baby's life, but not as it's 'mother'.  if you really want to keep the baby and raise it, then you have to turn yourself around and realize that yes, you will be caring for a baby that you never wanted at the moment.  it's not such a terrible thing, though, children are gifts from heaven!  if you finish school before the baby is born, that would be great, but you should definitely stay in school as long as you can and try your hardest to finish.  you can even take college courses online to further your education to provide a better life for yourself and the baby.  as for the guy...he may come around one day and be sorry for taking off, but if you keep the baby he has a legal responsibility to pay for child support.  he is probably terrified of being a father.  your baby's father may want to be a part of the baby's life after all.  you still have 9 (or 8, depending on how far along you are) months until the baby is born, and a lot can happen in that period of time.  it's not an easy decision to make, and it will affect you for the rest of your life.  but if you know you can't provide a baby with the life it needs, then i would highly suggest adoption.  i hope for all the best for you, good luck.

Answer 6

First off, you need to grow up because when you say "i want to have a life of my own.. not sit all day caring for this stupid baby that i never even wanted" thats harsh.

You sure do need some advice, why dont you go and see a doc to make sure your baby is alright. Tell your family, be responsible, way to go on making the right choice on keeping the little one. I was pregnant at 18. It will change your life completly, no more freedom for you. Have you conciderd adoption? i think that would be the best choice for you. Oh, and uhum..grow up a little.

Answer 7

well first off u need suport and talk to ur mom u need prenatal vitams and plz tell ur twin u should be tight

Answer 8

maybe you should consider adoption it isn't abortion so you will have to go through a few months of pregnancy and then labor and delivery but if you decide to give your child to someone who is ready and wants to have one. and then yo can have your own life like you wanted. it must be hard to be in your situation and i don't know what it is like to be a teenage parent but you can plan on adoption and if you decide that you want the baby after it is born you just don't sign the papers

good luck!

Answer 9

You should tell your twin sister and then tell your parents. I think you will eventually find plenty of guys to date because past a certain age guys won't mind (it's only when they are young and still in college that they don't feel ready to be a dad). I'm sure when the baby is born and you hold it for the first time you will find it hard to hate it anymore. You should get a gynecologist, start taking prenatal vitamins, and read a lot of books about pregnancy, childbirth, and parenting. Good for you for keeping the baby!

Answer 10

the first thing u gotta do is TELL YOUR PARENTS!!!

im sorry but there are gonna be a LOT of hardships ur gonna face..first you'll feel depressed all the time..you won't be able to live a normal teen life, you'll lose a pretty big amount of money for the baby,hospital..medical bills...then theres finishing school..im not sure if you will..and school is what you need to get good jobs,education to care for your child..it's partly your fault this baby is here...and there is no rewind button..so your just gonna have to live the hardships..and hopefully you'll have a good future cause most..like 8 percent in 10 teen moms get to live that average family..no worry life..good luck...o yah..don't worry to much...there are thousands or help lines,websites for teen moms, and some even lend money...so...good luck..you'll need it

Answer 11

Honestly I applaud your decision to keep the baby that is a HUGE step and I hope you will keep to it!

As for the other stuff, you will find a guy later who is willing to treat you the way you should be treated, however it may not come at first.

I believe you will find the bond between mother and child will be much more appealing.

Revealing the pregnancy could be difficult but even though it might be rough at first you will find others around you who will be supportive.

Have fun, this will be allot more interesting than you think :)

Answer 12

there is daycare, wellfare, adoption

lots of options for you, a caring guy will not care whether you have a child or not. you will be okay

Answer 13

i was depressed in the beginning too because i was so scared. even after i told my family, i didnt feel better. It was towards the middle that i started to feel excited and it got better and better. don't hate your unborn child. it'll be tough but you'll do just fine.

Answer 14

it o.k. your going through the first stage

Answer 15

You should really look into adoption, because if you don't want this baby you're not going to be the best parent. I'm not trying to be offensive what so ever. There are a lot of prospective parents who would love it if you gave them the gift of life, and you can continue to have your life.

Answer 16

First things first, the baby is not stupid...

Anyway, It's good that you are not aborting it.  Adoption is always a possibility, just make sure you are doing it for the child and not for yourself.  If you plan on raising it yourself, there is alot you will need to think about, but it is very doable.  

As far as a guy wanting to date you?  Yes, plenty would want to date you...It's actually a blessing in disguise.  Immature guys with no responsibility will see a woman with a child and be scared off.  You usually get the guys who are interested in a real relationship and not just a one night stand.  I dated a girl who had a baby, it didn't work mostly because of personality differences, but she was still great...easily one of my better girlfriends.  

It's rough, but try not to get down about it...The guy is a piece of Sh*t and you are better off without someone that pathetic and irresponsible around your child...

Finally, go talk to your parents, your friends, your family...You will need their support and advice much more than you need a bunch of stranger's.  Good luck with everything, you will be fine...I promise :)

Answer 17

First, you need all of the support that you can get.  That being said, I think you should tell your sister and family.  This baby could be a blessing for you if you let it be.  Your life will go on even with a child.  You will still date, work, etc.  Your life just took a different path than what you expected, but it doesn't mean that it is the wrong path.  Good luck with everything.

Answer 18

im sorry the guy left you. that sucks.

but i asked my brothers if they would date someone who had a child and they said no. too much responsibility right now. i think you should carefully think about what your gonna say to your parents and handle this like an adult.

and if you wanted a life of your own you shouldnt of had s*x because the chances of getting pregnant are high. sorry but no more party life or freedom.

Answer 19

Well first off do not say that you plan to keep it then say "stupid baby that i never even wanted".

There are some good guys out there who will date a girl who already had a baby. You just got to find one. It will/ may be hard at first. My bestie found a good guy like that when her daughter was three. He adopted her as his own.

Answer 20

Well for one I'm glad to hear that you aren't going to be dependent on a guy that wants no part of you or ur unborn child. You and your child will probably be all the better for it. Secondly its perfectly normal to be afraid of what is to come. We can't guarentee that things will be okay but you can try your best. After the baby is born it will be rough for a while. You are going to have to learn to put your child before things and sometimes thats hard as a teen. You will have to work very hard to finish school or go to college if thats what you want to do. As for guys, yes there are guys that date women with children. The ones that don't like the fact that you have a child, you dont want around anyways. Always put your child in front of everyone. If and when you can get child support ffrom the father. You weren't the only one present during the conception of the baby. There are plently of great guys that don't see you as a mom but will see you as the person you are. My suggestion is to take things one step at a time. The sooner you tell your loved ones the better you will feel to have it out in the open. I hope all goes well for you and your unborn child. Best of luck

Answer 21

guys will like you, and if they dont, then they are not the right ones. if a guy loves you for you and loves your child then he is real. many many guys like girls with kids, and especialy nowadays when its a normal thing to have kids at a young age. so dont even worry of that. i admire you for not wanting an abortion, im prolife/anti abortion, i beileve all life needs a chance to live. tell your sister and your parents, its better if you do. adopt the child out to a loving family  if you cant keep it

Answer 22

u need psychiatric care if u are calling it a stupid baby, u knew that the possibility of becoming pregnant was high during sexual activity it was also your choice to have s*x, and now u know to keep the borders closed