Pressure to be pregnant help!!

Question

I'm about to be 16..and I have a bf weve been together for about 5 months..and I'm not saying I want to have a baby with him. But society and where I live;all these teenage pregnancys are making me want a baby even though I know I shouldn't It alost dosent help that my mom had me as a teenager,like her mom did 2,and my aunt,and cousin..I'm surrounded by it...what should I do?

Answer 1

shut up. you annoy me.

Answer 2

This is so stupid.

Don't you understand after you break up with your bf (and you will before you go to college) you can't go out with your friends or go party because you have a kid to take care of.

It will also be impossible to go to college with a baby.

So if you have a baby with your bf, you won't have a very active social life and you can't go to college.

Not very smart is it?

Answer 3

Rise above it.  Just because everyone in your family was a teen mother doesn' t mean that you can't be the one to break the cycle.

You should know firsthand about the difficulties of being a teenage mother, having been surrounded by them (and having been raised by one).  What kind of a future do you want for yourself? What kind of future do you want for your children?  

Make plans for a better future for yourself, and start looking into colleges.  Save the babymaking until later in life when you are older, more mature, have an education, a great job, and a husband.

Five months may seem like a long time to you, but I can assure you it isn't.  My husband and I dated for almost four years before we got married, and we waited another five years before having our first baby.  There is no rush.  You have your entire life ahead of you, so enjoy being young, live your life, and wait to become a mother.

Answer 4

Enjoy being a teenager! Make sure that if you are having s*x that you are using as much protection as possible. Break the chain that your family has created, there is so much time to have a baby and if you have one now you miss out on so much of your childhood! I had baby fever at one time too, and now that I have a baby I am glad I waited until I had finished college, had a few years to enjoy my life and get married! You can do it!

Answer 5

No one in my family graduated college.

But i will, what they did doesn't mean anything to me.  

Answer 6

just don't do it. you know whats right. trust me there is no pressure you are just doing it to yourself

Answer 7

Yea, don't blame it on society. You've heard of will power, right?  

Answer 8

Sixteen is young to have a baby, that is for sure. So many amazing years are ahead of you and having a baby will complicate things a little. Babies are great, when you are ready for one. I was married and 21 when I had my daughter and I love her to no end, but I did have to miss out on a lot of things that not having a baby would have allowed me to do. I wouldn't change things, but just realize that a baby is hard work. They are a full-time job and are always there...you can't just take a break from them.

In a town where young people are getting pregnant and even your family had babies at young ages...personally I would strive to be the one that is different. You could be the one at 20 that can actually stay out until 2:00 am without worrying who will keep the kid....just a thought.  

Answer 9

Don't have s*x.

Don't blame it on society either.

Answer 10

It is quite clear you know what you want, which is a future. You don't have to be like everyone else, if you feel that pressure, then just tell them that having a baby at an early age isn't the life you want to live. Maybe you should talk with your Mom, have you asked her what it was like for her to raise you at a young age? Did you ask her what she missed in her life because she was too busy taking care of you? Do you want to do different things? Do you want to go to college? Do you want to have a career? Those things are not easy with a child. It would be hard to continue your eductaion because you wouldn't be able to provide the money to pay for it, and be stuck working at a low paying job just to make ends meet. Everything you will do will be for that child, all your dreams and hopes would be much harder to achive. I'm sure you like your boyfriend, but that isn't a reason to have a child with him. You'd be better off finishing high school, going to college or a tech school and getting a career so you can afford your own life, move away if you want, travel, experice the world and see what else is out there for you. I'm sure that your mom doesn't want you to follow the same path as her. Please wait and don't feel like you have pressure, most of socity doesn't want another teen with a child to support with thier tax money to pay for food stamps and welfare. Please Please Please grow up to be an adult and have a few years of adult responsibilies under your belt first before you decide to have a baby.

Answer 11

Dont be silly. Grow up by proving to this society you blame that you are better than that. All us grown ups have to pay for your medical care cuz teenagers make dumb choices that take a toll on not only their lives, but the lives of the poor kids they have. Some girls can do it, Some cant. No matter how ready you think you are...your not!!!

Answer 12

DonT do It!!!!!!!!!!! ii have a baby and im only 14 its alot of responsibility you have no idea how hard it is seeing your friends go out and have fun while your stuck at home with a baby that wont stop crying,wont let you sleep,and you cant do what you want.Its no longer about you its ALL about your baby so you should have fun, party, travel and then have kids..

Answer 13

  Please don't get pregnant.  My tax dollars can not support another undwed teen mommy on welfare.  Be better than them and your family.  Get an education, a great paying job, then marry the man of your dreams.  After that then you can have your baby/babies.  Trust me you will be glad you did it the right way.

Answer 14

It's not all glam like the magazines and society make teenage pregnancy out to be. It's a really tough thing, especially when you are still going through school. It can put huge stress on a relationship and just think of all the things that you would be missing out on. I didn't go to my senior prom because I was in the beginning of my pregnancy and was sicker than ever. All I would do is lay on the couch once I got home from school because I was so nauseated. It's tough to handle getting ready for a baby, still going through school, having a social life, and trying to come up with money for all of these different things that I need, our new house needs or what the baby might need. My parents are a wonderful help, but they can't provide us with everything. Think about everything before something happens. Get on birth control if you are going to continue to have s*x, and be safe about everything.

Answer 15

Since your whole family had a baby at such a young age, it may just seem normal.  But trust me, you DON'T want to have a child now.  You won't be able to finish high school and might not go to college.  If you don't go to college you will have a struggle finding a good job to support your child.  Wait.  It's only been 5 months.  Couples who normally get married stay together longer than that.  THEN you should have children, after college, when you have a job, and in a committed relationship (not saying you have to be married)

Answer 16

if your family is wrong doesn't mean that you should be wrong too. Be your own person and have your own judgment. Did you watch the "Baby Borrowers"? It was a good lesson for the teenagers that they thought that they wanted to have baby, now none of them want to have baby any time soon.. if you have baby now, you will not be able to enjoy high school, college, being young that kind of life.. think through it. I'm glad that I walked through my life step by step and now sometimes I think back I do regret that I didn't enjoy enough my teenage years coz I so wanted to grow up at that time..

Answer 17

Wow, you want to have s*x after hearing about all those pregnancies?!? You're crazy.

Answer 18

maybe try taking a parenting class.. they ussually give you one of those simulation babies to carry around.  It may make you think twice about what motherhood entails.

Think about things you enjoy doing now..  hanging out with friends, shopping, seeing movies, etc..  all these things change once you have a baby to care for.  You wont have as much money to spend on yourself, because you spent it on diapers and formula.  You wont have free time for parties and movies unless you can find a sitter..  no one wants to be stuck watching your baby every weekend either!

Parenthood can be a blessing.. but most young people are not ready to take on that responsability yet.