Problem with the boss

Question

I have started in a new job, which is a 6 month contract. I am a secretary to a lawyer. I have now been here 2 months. My boss is getting my back up by regularly checking up on my work and nit picking. He will also fire questions at me in succession and expects me to know answers on the spot. I am an experienced secretary adn I work hard and he has already commented on this more than once. I feel that we I need to speak to him becuase I am already becoming resentful and if I don't say something, I will probably be rude or snap at him.

The problem is how to address this with him so that I don't come across too aggressively and without upsetting him.

Any advice welcomed

Answer 1

Often when you lodge a complaint with the boss, you find that he had little idea you feel the way you do or that you were emotionally involved in the matter. Complaints can be useful in establishing your identity in the boss's mind, and you can build a more constructive working relationship. Obviously, though, much depends on how you air your grievance.

1. Focus on the facts.

Suppose you've been handed an addditional assignment when you feel that you're ready up to your neck. Center the discussion on your work load. Don't say your work load is heavier than someone else's. That may lead your boss to defeind the other person's workload without lightening yours. Besides, a charge of unfairness, whether stated directly or implied, is not likely to change anyone's mind.  Your boss has probably given a lot of thought to what is fair, just as you do when apportioning responsibility.

2. Give your boss  a chance to explain or defend the action. You presented the facts as you see them, but your boss may see it differently. You may get some essential information along the way. For example, the boss may see you having more knowhow. That's why he is firing questions at you in rapid succession and expects answers immediately. Talking it out with him will clear the air -- and make you feel better.

On the other hand, you may still be convinced you've been unfairlyly treated. Restate your case now that you know his point of view. Just lay out the evidence.

3. Most important. Try to keep anger out of your comments. Any grievance is best discussed coolly. When you complain about a problem, you make more of an impact on the boss when you're prepared to offer a solution to that problem.

Sometimes, though, it is hard to keep your cool. In that case, vent your anger in private. Never embarrass your boss in front of others. Also acknowledge that you're feeling angry. Don't deny it. Your boss will more likely accept your anger if you accept it.

Answer 2

Keep it simple, get to the point, and above all don't get personal.  Its possible he's not aware of how he's coming across to you.  If your initial discussion doesn't resolve the problem then you may have to take it up with HR who may have to step in as a mediator.  If there are issues with work product, make sure you document your work because you never know when you'll need it.  If he doesn't change after this, then he may be one of those know it all bosses who really doesn't care to change or enjoyings raising the count on all of the assistant's he's gone through. If so, its time to move on to greener pastures.

Answer 3

Maybe he is a Narcissist.

It looks like he is so “sure of himself” that he feel a need to try to put you down to make himself feel better that he knows best.

I would ask him for a 15 minute private meeting. Get prepared for unpredictable situation, like him telling you he doesn’t what you are talking about. Tell him honestly what you do not appreciate and let him know that you are a professional and after 2 months of work feel like you have proved yourself. It could be just HIS personality. Maybe he is the same way at home – not able to let go of his control and perfectionism.