Proper greetings for women? Ma'am, Miss, Lady, Girl?

Question

Like when an employee at a store greets you... "Miss, here is your bag", or "This girl was wondering which isle the toilet paper is in.", etc.

What's the proper etiquette, when do you know which one to use? Age factors into it, I mean you wouldn't call a 65 year old woman a 'girl', right? At what ages does it change?

Do some people get offended if you use the 'wrong' word? Just curious.

Answer 1

Use your visual judgement. If they look young call them miss. If they look over 50 call them madam.

Answer 2

"Ma'am" seems to be the most encompassing term of the ones you listed.  Just to be as objective as possible, I usually say "individual" whenever I can, as with phrases like, "This individual would like to know where the paper towels are."  A few people may get offended if you call them what they consider to be the wrong thing, but as long as you aren't trying to be insulting, I wouldn't worry about it.

Answer 3

Ma'am..........Never lady that sounds ugly.

It would be like saying......Man here is your bag.

Answer 4

In general, "lady" and "gentleman" are the words to use. Unless the lady in question is age 6 or the gentleman is a toddler. I call people "Ma'am" and "Sir". If they're very young, they get a kick out of it, but they're not offended, not in my experience.

Some people are going to get offended no matter what, so don't worry about them.

Answer 5

I work in a credit union and I tend to use names as much as possible (we get all the members info on our screen).  I try and stay away from titles such as Mrs. and Miss. as it can be offensive (ie; if you call someone Mrs. and they're recently divorced or Miss and recently married).  Ms. is generally a much more neutral term.  

I try and avoid calling people Ma'am as it can offend people (especially if they are reletively young).  Lady and gentleman is generally more acceptable (ie; "This lady would like some information on our homeloans..).  However in a more formal environment (such as a nice restaurant) Ma'am may be appropriate, especially for older woman.

The worst mistake that one can make however is calling someone/group of people "guys".  Ie; "Hey guys can I take your order".  It sounds vulgar and uneducated.

Answer 6

If I were talking to another employee I think I would say "this customer" is looking for the toilet paper. If I were addressing the customer I would use Ma'am. I'm from the South, so Ma'am is used a lot more than Miss or Madame in my neck of the woods.

One thing I can tell you for certain that will offend any woman over 30 is to call her "young lady" if you are obviously younger than she is.  I've walked out on several sales in the last few years because young salesmen insist on calling me "young lady". It grates on my nerves to even hear those words anymore..........

Answer 7

Yeah, it's either lady, gentleman, ma'am or sir. I usually use sir and ma'am too....