Psychological effects on a pre pubescent 14 year old who was molested by preg mothers significant other?

Question

Been with this "man" for over 2 years, been working on building a life together, am currently 7 month preg with his child. Long story short..my 14 year old daughter not fully developed yet, came to me a month ago stating that my "other" had been trying to have "s*x" with her for 2 to 3 weeks not constantly every night but, like 1-4 times a week. ( hes currently being charged with repeat sexual assault of a child) there was no penetration ( doesn't make it any less horrible) but mostly "fondling her genitals and straddling her 2 times while she was on her stomach with her pants down and his p***s coming in contact with her genitals once he ejaculated...(god I hate saying this to the world) she told him no a few times but he would just come back later in the night and try again...she did not initiate it or enjoy it she was a "passive" participate unsure of what to do...PHEW .....I have tried searching the web for info on this and I cant find anything use full I am trying to find out what the effects may be on her....we are going to counseling please dint go there and we talk as much as she allows..I know its got to be horrible on her..she going to have a sister that was "fathered" by this pervert...shes is starting high school in sept.

Answer 1

You need to get away from him...now. He is putting your daughter in danger, and what's to say he won't do it to your baby when she gets older? Yes, your daughter is probably traumatized. You need to get her to therapy and away from that monster.  

Answer 2

uh TELL THE POLICE

ARE YOU ******* INSANE?!

Answer 3

sexual abuse can have so many different effects on kids.

it could bring in anything from self harming to overly sexual and what some would call sluttish behaviors ( oh i hat the use of s**t but it is something most  people do understand as a type of behavior)

Make shore she knows it was not her fault and just as it is not your fault you did from the sounds of it the right thing as soon as you know what was going on. so do not blame yourself after all their is a lot of others out there that well be will to do that for you! but you did the right thing and that is wonderful

how it will effect her development of her body should not be effected by it but her mental development could be altered in that while you said her activity in it was passive does not matter she knows what it can feel like and so she may be more incline to be masturbating to get that feeling back not to mention that she is also 14 years old and should be exploring her sexuality anyway.

I would also like to add something too it does not matter if she was passive or actively seeking it out from him he is a adult and she is a child he should have known better and so it does not matter what her actions was in that matter.

as to the sister that was fathered by him that is all his activity is in it tell her that he was and is no more then just a sperm Donner and has nothing to do with her sister and that her sister is not responsible for what he did to her.

your concealer that you have her seeing over this should be able to tell you what to exact more so!

she is 14 so i would not expect anything like Dissociative Identity Disorder as she is a little too old for that one to come in but if her personality is not set properly then it is possibly ( have that one myself as i was raped by my parents from age 6 month to 14 years old) if she goes into being sexually active you need to just make shore she is safe

mostly let her know that she did nothing wrong

I wish you the best with this if you want to can tack me off the group please feel free to at [e-mail] and i will be happy to help where i can  

Answer 4

Of course it's going to be hard for her going back to school and everything, but it's going to be hard on your family, and you too.

Each child is different when it come's to sexual abuse, some have trusting issues the rest of their lives, have sexual relationship problems in the future and others can't seem to hold onto a relationship.

Some kids get depressed, angry, and sometimes school performance drops.

The best thing to do is to do what you're doing, get counseling.

Answer 5

HE WAS A s*x OFFENDER AND YOU LET HIM NEAR YOUR CHILD?!?!?  ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?!

Oh, boy, lady -- I am going to let you have it with both barrels.  Your daughter is YOUR responsibility and it is up to you to keep her safe and away from perverts.  Instead, you not only invite one into your home, you actually choose to have a child with him!!  And your your first reaction is to "check the web" instead of calling the police and having his butt arrested?!?.  

He should be in jail for molesting your daughter and your daughter needs intense counseling, whether she wants it or not.  You didn't mention whether or not he was in jail, but I devoutly hope that that was just a detail that you left out.  If not, he should be in jail by sunset.

Good God, lady, are you so seriously out of touch with reality that you really think you can "built a life" with a sexual predator?  What kind of "life" were you thinking of?

EDIT:  Sorry, but your post before you edited it made it sound as if you knew he had a prior history, not that he was currently in jail.  If he's in jail, then good for you.

Answer 6

I was molested when I was 11. By my dad. My parents were married for 16 years, and knew eachother for 18 years before he started molesting me. My parents made sure I didnt tell CPS or anything, because they love eachother, believe in second chances, and want to be married forever. You're leaving him right? That's the right thing to do. I didn't get counseling on the subject. My mom got me a counselor that started telling me I needed to improve my social skills, didn't stand up for me, and was too quiet. You know what the effects are? You don't know why in the world you're living here, why you were even born, and why nobody cares about you. I cry every day, and I don't even know why I go on living every day. I spend all day daydreaming about a life that I know will never come true, but I need that because that's the only thing that keeps me going every day. I don't believe in God anymore. I prayed to him. For the 6 months I was being molested, and the time after that - After I told my mom, and nothing happened. NOTHING. OF course, for her it's like - he's going to go away. MY dad is living with me, and my little brother, and maybe his grandchildren for the rest of my life. It makes me sick. If she doesn't tell anybody, nobody will care. People will just see her as that weird girl who has issues. Yeah, high school might be stressful; but you can't get out of it. Life goes on, and life sucks. Some people just have to learn to live with that.