Psychological torture or conditioning oneself for psychological warfare?

Question

For the past 5 months, i have been listening to "lovey dovey" music while watching people getting brutally murdered, burned, limbs hacked off, etc. I played some military simulator the other day on the hardest difficulty while listening to "crazy little thing called love" by queen or "strangers in the night" by Frank sinatra. I wasn't bothered or confused by the music playing, i killed all my targets.

I listen to opera when handling assassination simulators or long range sims. Bouncy love songs and a mixture of techno/NIN to everything else.

Answer 1

one thing is certain... or two things:

1. if you don't use it you lose it (for the better or worse, depending on you)

2. with practice, the brain gets better with something.... so u better choose wisely that something u want to be an expert at...

One way or another u will become expert at that something, for better or worse...depending on you

Answer 2

Dont worry about it much. This kind of stage comes up in teenagers. It will be good if you could mention ur age. I went through a similar thing myself. I used to watch psycho movies, horror movies. and do creepy stuff like roam in the dark in the mid night in weird places. Scientifically speaking, what happens when you do this kind of stuff is, you get an adrenaline rush. Just enjoy whatever you are going through.