Public Schools? Would you send your kids??

Question

I am very concerned with how disrespectful kids seem to be.. twords any authority figures, not that there aren't really great kids in public school. Yet drugs, violence ect..is over the top. I am shocked at the stories I hear from my friends with kids in public school. My husband and I both went to public school and turned out fine. But the things I am hearing these days..it makes me cringe at the thought of sending my daughter off to kindergarden with some of these kids that have no reguard for anyone. My husband says I can't shelter her..that she has to learn street smarts (in which I agree) yet, I'd feel like I was sending her into the middle of a war zone. Any advise would be greatly appriciated.

Answer 1

First of all, public school isnt a bad place AT ALL. Many students go there and graduate and most of the time turn out better than private and home schoolers.  Private school is just a waste of money. I mean $1,500-$3,000 a year or even a month?! its such a waste of money. if you want a good education then send her to the gifted pogram, im in it and its public schooled. the gifted pogram is smarter than children in private schools. in private schools you just get to learn more stuff like about jesus, religion and that c**p. when you go to private school your just paying for the religion learning, the uniform, and the school. all schools are the same even private.

Answer 2

I think you're being a little too worried.  Just teach her right from wrong and she should be okay.  I mean you said yourself you went to public school and turned out fine.  Just talk to her and tell her what's okay and what isn't.  I think kids who are homeschooled seem to have people skills at all (personal experience).  If you enroll her and absolutely hate it then take her out.  Its worth a try though.  So many smart and normal people have been educated through public schooling.   Good luck to your family.

Answer 3

well i think it all depends on the area you live in. for example i live in North Carolina and in the city i live the the public schools are horrible i have some students who go to my magnet high school who act like there in elementary school. but in my old town in texas (near the border of mexico) the students are nice and though the schools are kinda old they still have good safe enviorment

Answer 4

It sounds like the problem is endemic to the neighborhood in which you or your friends live, or their specific school, especially if these problems are occurring with kindergartners.  I wouldn't write off "public schools" with one stroke, if you are in a city in which you can choose your school, or move to a nearby neighborhood with a school without such issues.

My kids go to public schools (one middle, one elementary) and they both socialize with amazingly great kids.  I also have attended events at both schools with large quantities of the student body, and I found the kids to be very respectful to each other and to the adults.  One of these schools draws from a wide socio-economic spectrum, by the way.  And about the respect, I gave compliments to the school principal, because it starts with him.  When the faculty shows respect to the students, they show it back.

Not to say we haven't done some steering of friendships over the years, but generally, kids (like adults) will gravitate to people who have the same values that they do.  Your daughter is not going to suddenly start hanging around with kids who do drugs and commit violent acts, if that is not something she sees as being acceptable in her family environment.

Take some tours of the schools available to you and your daughter and then decide, based on what is best for your family.  don't rely only on other people's stories.  It's more entertaining for them to rant about the horrors than to babble on about the amazing math teacher in grade three.

Answer 5

My 2 girls go to pulic school, yes the kids are mean and the parents dont seem to care to much. But it is up to you to be involved in there schooling. I have to work 40 hours a week, I live in California, I cant be be a the school. I ask everyday, how were your days? Did anything exiting or bad happen? They tell me. The only real thing that I have encountered was the bullying, I have put a stop to that immediatley. I have a kindergardener and a 3d grader. It is not my choice to put them in public but I cannot afford 4,000 a month for 2 kids to send them to private.

Answer 6

I think it depends on your school system and your parenting style.  I also truly believe some kids are just born bad and they either get better as adults or never.  

My issues are different. Three different school systems failed to teach my brothers to read in elementary school.  MANY teachers actually believe that our language is not phonetic (WHAT? --shudder--.  I would make certain my kids could read (homeschool) before sending them to public school. Keep in mind, private school is no better.  The premier drug dealer in my town when I was in high school was a star student at the local Catholic school.

Answer 7

dont worryy. trust me private school isnt much better. i go to public school right now and have for my whole life..but kids in my neighborhood that go to private school do drugs and  everything while their parents think they are goodd.public school is not that baddd

Answer 8

I understand your concern. Ridiculing and bullying have always been present in modern day public schools and just because we endured those times doesn't necessarily mean you child has to go through this "rite of passage".  First of all-is there any way for you to volunteer at the school or to somehow be involved so that you can meet the other children in your child's classroom and sort of be around without clinging?  In our school there are lunchroom volunteers, folder volunteers, homeroom moms/dads, parents who aid the teacher by reading stories to groups of kids.  Any of these activities help the school, and most importantly help you keep on eye on what exactly is going on in the school.  This helped me when my daughter went to kindergarten.   Second- Teachers generally have a pretty good handle on elementary level kids.  But, have you visited your school?  You can get a pretty good idea how the kids in general behave by asking to observe at recess or lunchtime. This may also ease your mind.  It's generally not as bad as you would imagine. Third, and most important:  Building self confidence at home is crucial for kids. Definitely make sure your daughter knows her strengths and feels good about herself.  This really helps. Depending on the temperament of your child, she may be absolutely fine-thank you very much- handling those "troubled" kids on her own.  Some kids just are.  If she is shy or just not as emotionally strong, just take it year by year, but continue to monitor the school closely- get to know her friends- and ask her questions.  She should be just fine.  Good luck.

Answer 9

I wouldn't send my kids to one of those liberal indoctrination camps to be shot at.

Home school your kids.

Answer 10

No.

You need to keep in mind though that private schools are not immuned to having problems. They just don't pubicize them like the public education circuit does so they are not as prevelant in people's minds.

Answer 11

Well I suppose it depends where you live as well. I live in a nice area and the schools are nice. My 4 boys all go to public school and do fine. My older 3 are honor roll and high honor students and my youngest is in 2nd grade and he has a learning disability but he gets a lot of help and the school has been good about it.

Also I hate to tell you this but the only way to assure your kids aren't exposed to anything you might not approve of, you would need to homeschool because if you think all kids in private school are somehow angels you are sadly mistaken. The only difference between public school and private is what you pay, kids are kids and they are all part of the same community.

Answer 12

While there are certainly some public school systems in need of reform, many are quite good.  We live in a small community with an excellent public school system.  I am mom to 4 kids who are now 28, 26, 23, and 10.  The older 3 are all graduates of the same high school I attended and my 10 year old is in 5th grade.  I spend a lot of time in the schools as a parent volunteer and this helps me stay connected to what is going on in the schools my kids attend.  Unfortunately, if you go only by what the media shows, you would think that every public school is a complete disaster with kids running the schools with no regard for adult authority.  Also, it is the unusual stuff that most people will talk about.  If drug use or violence were common occurrences no one would talk about them because it wouldn't be newsworthy.  Public schools can be toured by anyone with proper arrangements.  I suggest, to ease your mind, call your child's potential school and ask for a tour of the school.  See for yourself what is going on there.  There are always other educational options for parents.  Many states have charter schools that are public schools but are usually focused on some specific academic method.  They are open to everyone, but usually have an enrollment period.  Private or religious schools are also an option as is homeschooling.  I do understand your hesitancy, however.  When my 10 year old first started kindergarten, I went through a period of considering other educational options, including homeschooling, because things in the schools "seemed" to be much worse than when my older kids went to school.  However, once we got in the system again and I got to know the teachers, the adminstration, and the parents, I was much more comfortable with sending her to public school.

Answer 13

i completely understand but i belive if you teach a child good morals and right from wrong then they will make the right decison though they will make mistakes it part of growing up and she needs to know that youll be there to comfort her and help her through the consiquences. but it sounds as if your a good mom so dont worry to much she needs to experience life now and make mistakes early so she can learn from them and turn into the wonderful person shes ment to be.

Answer 14

News flash! There are drugs and  violence in ALL schools Private or Public. There is nothing wrong with Public schools. It gives the children the chance to be around kids of all races and such. You need to stop hovering over your child!

Answer 15

It's not a war zone, it's  a different perspective of looking at things. I went through the same feelings you are experiencing and can attest that my children are turning out alright. You just need to be sure that you teaching them the proper values and morals, at home, that will help them once they become adults.

All three of my children attend public schools. The two youngest are in Advanced classes and the oldest is in the IB program. So I can honestly say that if you are active in your child's life (without being over-protective) they should turn out just fine.