Punctuation Questions! Easy 10 Points!!!?

Question

Ok, here are some questions i have about punctuation...

Is this correct? :

I stood there, breathless. Hoping for this to be nothing but a nightmare- a dream that would soon vanish from my memory as soon as my alarm clock woke me up. But it wasn't. I was really standing here, and he was really gone.

AND

It's times like these when you really question the words 'forever and ever', but times like these that remind you of one simple word, four letters. So easy to feel, but so hard to say- love.

I'm not sure when to put a period, when to use a comma, or when to use a hyphen. Could you please help me out?

Thanks so much!

Answer 1

I stood there, breathless; hoping for this to be nothing but a nightmare, A dream that would soon vanish from my memory as soon as my alarm clock woke me up. But it wasn't. I was really standing here, and he was really gone.

It's times like these when you really question the words: 'forever and ever', but times like these that remind you of one simple word; four letters. So easy to feel, but so hard to say, love.

Answer 2

I stood there, breathless, hoping for this to be nothing but a nightmare. A dream that would soon vanish from my memory as soon as my, alarm clock woke me up. But it wasn't. I was really standing here, and he was really gone.

Answer 3

If your teacher gives you creative license, then what you wrote is ok, you just need to make one/two changes.   Good sentence structure to convey the dramatic effect.

"I stood there, breathless, hoping"

^because hoping is modifying I in the sentence and that participial phrase can't stand alone.  

The only other change, is to make the hyphen in "but a nightmare- a dream" into a comma.  But it is fine as it is.  A lot of poets do this (Emily Dickinson) and J.D. Salinger uses a lot of hyphens.  But since they were professionals, they had the creative license to do so.  So it depends on your situation.