Punishing our five year old.

Question

Our five year old Mia continues to throw things trip and lock her three year old brother Lucien in the room. My husband says spank her. I am not sure about what her punishment should be. I agree with spanking, but not so sure in this case. Need opinions. I do not want to hear spanking is wrong in all occasions. We have tried just about everything. Taking away stuff time out earlier bed time. Everything pretty much but spanking. She has been spanked twice in her life. Once for throwing hot soup on me and once for going outside without permission. Just want some opinions.

Answer 1

why not try talking to her about why she is so sad and acting out..she isnt an adult she doesnt have the skills to handle jealousy and feeling like 2nd place to her baby sibling..instead of being a mean parent and bent on punishing emotions ..try nurturing and understanding

Answer 2

Start taking special toys or previleges away from her. Try locking her in the room and see how she likes it- just for a minute. Just long enough for that feeling. Hold the door shut so she can sense what her Brother might be feeling. Let her know that this is the way it feels for her Brother and that is not to do it again or she will start losing television time, special toys, special outings and such.  

Answer 3

I would like to know if she acts out regularly.  

You know, a lot is to be said of diet.  I once had a little girl in my preschool class that would act out like that, and her parents were great at searching for help.  She went to behavioral and occupational therapy but nothing seemed to work.  It wasnt until they took her to an allergy specialist, who discovered that she was allergic to red food dyes, that anything had noticeably made a difference.  And Im telling you this girl went from throwing solid wood blocks across the room in random fits to a well-behaved polite little girl.  It was like night and day with her.

You may want to look for medical explanations.  Good luck!    

  

Answer 4

I would say spank her. You don't want this kind of behavior getting out of hand. Try spanking her in front of her brother; spanking generally doesn't hurt that much (or shouldn't), and it generally works because it's considered a "baby" punishment and is embarrassing. She won't like being shamed in front of her little brother, and it might make an impression on your little boy so that you won't have to punish him in the same way.

Answer 5

Does she need punishment? Or does she need extra attention. Kids display attention seeking behaviour for one really good reason. They need more attention.

Answer 6

in my opinion, spanking your child is not the right way to disipline her. of course your husband, being a man, thinks spanking is the right thing to do. sorry if we have different opinions on this, but there are other ways to go and this option should be kept as the last one. no offence, but apparently she hasn't been disiplined right in the past if she had to earn a spanking at all. if Mia goes to school she may have learned these things there. do you watch Mia when she's playing with her little brother? she wouldn't have tripped him or locked him in his room. little Mia probably is seeking more attention. that's why she's taking it out on Lucien, because he might be getting more attention than her. do you and your husband play with her -and- Lucien? you need to teach her to be nice to her little brother, by maybe going on a picnic or something---anything to bring your family a little closer. ask one of your girl friends [if they have children] how they disiplined their child.

good luck finding a solution :]

Answer 7

Take her favorite toy and put it on top of the fridge.  Tell her that she lost her toy due to her behavior and she can earn it back.  The more she acts up, the more toys she loses.  Worked on my kids.

Answer 8

get out a belt. put it in your hands make her lie down on a chair face down and hit her 3 times HARD no matter how hard she cries she will learn dont give in after 1 or 2 go for the 3.

Answer 9

Most of the people who answered need some help.  Spanking is absolutely not the right thing to do.  And Jazzy, I am a man with 2 boys, 3 and 4, and I completely disagree with spanking.  Just because I am a male, doesn't mean I agree with hitting kids.  Anyway, timeouts really do work.  You just have to be consistent with them.  Even if they get up again and again, keep putting them back.  Make sure you don't argue with your husband about her punishment if front of her.  You both have to be together when she can see you.  Also, make sure the timeout chair or place is always the same.  They have to know its not a good place to be.  I've never heard of putting toys in timeout, but maybe it'll work if she's really attached to it.  I love the name Mia by the way.  You better get this under control before she gets bigger and stronger though.  Good luck.

Answer 10

I know this will seem odd but I promise it works!Take her favorite toy and put it in time out. Do not alllow her to touch it for at least 5 minutes. Put it in a chair, facing the wall. If that doent work, completely empty her room, taking every thing out except for her bed. Tell her she must earn everything back by good behavior.If she acts right, give things back to her one at a time. If she acts out, remove it again.Everything. Including books, Tv, toys, paper, pencils, games, posters, the whole 9 yards. She will get the message.