Purity Balls:Would you like for you daugher to do it?

Question

As in would you ask her to commit to waiting until marriage to have s*x? I think that i would definitely try to influence her to

stay away from s*x until marriage because of the physical and

emotional dangers of premarital s*x.I would like for her to avoid all of the emotional malaise i've gone through growing up.

Purity balls are fancy,elaborate parties for fathers/daughters where p*****n and teen girls commit to waiting until marriage.

And then they are given a purity ring to commemorate it.

Some people consider it creepy to swear your virginity away but i think it takes a really loving parent to take their devotion to their child being happy to that level.There is no real advantage to them just finding out through trial and error,i have been there and done that and wish i could have avoided it and maybe i would have had my parents presented me with such an ideal.

Answer 1

I think it is creepy and the name just smacks of sexual innuendo, i find that alot with all of this ultra religious fanaticism c**p.

I would never expect my daughter to participate in a "purity ball" if she wanted to swear to keep her virginity until marriage I would counsel her on willpower and the ability to say no in any situation, then let her know if she does not succed it DOES NOT make her a bad person.

Answer 2

I don't know if I would go through all that elaborate stuff.  I think it is more important to have a running dialogue with your teenaged kids about s*x, STD's, pregnancy, their morals and values etc.  If I had thought for one moment that my Mom was actually paying attention to the stuff I was doing with my boyfriend, I might have done a lot less! LOL  If she had brought it up (yes I know it's uncomfortable) on a regular basis, perhaps it would have further cemented my own position, morally anyway, but we hardly ever talked about that stuff.

Answer 3

I am going to be a virgin until I'm married (I'll be 17 next month)

But I don't have a ring or anything like that.  Its not a promise to anyone but myself, so I don't need to advertise it.

My boyfriend respects my decision.  I love him so much more for it <33

Answer 4

well im not a mother i am 16 years old and i would appereciate it if my parents threw me a purity ball. i think it means a lot to a girl if you someone throws her a purity ball.  Before you do i  would make sure that she is still a virgin. I know many people who have lost there virginty and of course they dont tell there parents.

Answer 5

more than likely the girls gonna do what she wants anyways.....so basically you're just throwing her a party.

Answer 6

I would definitely encourage my daughter to save herself for marriage. I wish I had. As far as the purity ball goes, from what I saw on the Tyra show, it's kind of making a commitment to her dad that she wont have s*x. I think instead of that, I would hope she made that commitment to God, and her future husband. I think a purity ring is a great idea though, as a reminder of how important it is.

Answer 7

I don't think you need a fancy ball or ring to keep your child from having s*x.  Rather than throw away tons of money on a ridiculous excuse to have a party, and on jewelery, I'd prefer to have an open relationship with my child, make sure they are well educated and make informed decisions.

And why is this all directed towards daughters??  Sons don't deserve the same devotion??

Answer 8

Although it is a good idea in theory, I think it puts too much pressure on the girls (being afraid if they do have s*x of disappointing their parents and/or loved ones), I mean I understand waiting until marriage and that the parents are trying to protect their daughters.

I don't think it's creepy, when I was younger I thought I was going to save it until marriage (I had little religious background growing up) but ended up not, I didn't contract a STD or get pregnant. I think parents should emphasize safe s*x as well as abstinence. SOME teenagers, regardless of anything else are going to do what THEY (not their parents or anyone else) think is right at the time. Parents can try to influence their thinking but in the end it's all about the individual.

Answer 9

I don't think a dance and a ring would have stopped me from having s*x.  It theory, it is a sweet idea.  I would be afraid that it would cause my daughter to feel shame and if she were thinking about having s*x, she would keep it from me.  Not sending my girls to a Purity Ball.  I will TALK with them about s*x.

Answer 10

I think pre-teen is a bit young to have 'purity ball.'  maybe a purity day at one of the theme parks.. but it is a whole, whole lot better than 17 year old going to a hotel after the prom.  

Abstinence is a personal decision.  An 11 year old may change her mind when she is  19...and in love.

Answer 11

weird !! I mean i said i would wait but I didnt! I had s*x at 19 or 20 for the fisrt time with a guy friend.  AND whyisnt there thing liek this for boys. .I will teach my daughter respect for her self and everything s*x entails.. i am glad also i wasnt one when i got married.. my now hubby adn I HAD s*x before and it would have been weird the fitst time that night

Answer 12

Well, M, Once a woman has s*x, many cultures view her as impure. People and their misinterpretations of anatomy...

You're better off talking to her about it than throwing a party and expecting her to hold true. Young adults are good at two things: Making babies, and lies.

Trial and error is different for each and every person, as well. You cannot place your experiences into other people and claim to understand their elucidations. It doesn't work like that.

Take care.

Answer 13

I'd rather rely on my bringing her up right than on a gimmicky party.

Also, if you throw one of these parties and she gives it up anyway, she'll NEVER tell you about it!

I refrained from having s*x until I was 21 and almost done with college....and it was just because of how I was raised.

Answer 14

sorry but i don't agree with waiting for marriage before having s*x, especially from a female point of view... my first time was not pleasant as it hurt, i am so thankful that i didn't experience that on my wedding night. now i am not encouraging promiscuity either. i think it better to encourage your child to wait for the right relationship, 15 year olds who have been dating two months is NOT the right time... but if that same relationship lasts for a year i think it IS a natural progression... and of course you need to teach your child how to protect themselves from both pregnancy and STDs

Answer 15

I think ideas like this are ridiculous. It pressures your kids to live up to certain standards and then when they don't meet your expectations, they feel like ****. OR they are the rebellious type that just says "F YOU" and they go out and do what they want. I think instead of pushing abstinence we should teach our children MUCH better s*x education and be there to help provide proper birth control.

Answer 16

I'm not a mother, but if I had a daughter, yes, absolutely!

Answer 17

No I would never have my daughters' do something like that. Usually it is the fathers' that are behind this and they pledge their purity to their fathers' and I think that it is creepy. I think the same s*x parent is the one who should have the most influence on the child in that area.

Talking with your kids' on a regular basis and educating them I think is enough. I think these Purity Balls are setting young girls up to be very screwed up later on. What if they don't keep their vow can you imagine the guilt the child will feel and do you think they will tell their parents they broke the vow?

I think it is setting them up for keeping secrets and eventually less communication with their parents depending on the girl. Teenagers do experiment and while we don't want them to, we want them to be open and honest with us as parents and I just think that doing something like this instead of education and teaching morals and standards will keep a more open relationship with the parents.

Answer 18

i think if my mother would have done that for me i would have been really embarassed. i'd just talk to her about it. in the end she's gonna do what SHE wants to do