Question Of TACT: How to approach a widow about buying her dead husbands car?

Question

I know of a vehicle owned by a man who died Aug 4.

I have been watching this car for months (it never moved), interested in buying it but not knowing of the owner until today.

I am in a hurry to find a nice used car and I want this one.

The problem is I don't know the best way to approach his widow about if she would like to sell it now.

What is the smoothest way to approach a situation like this?

Is there a "standard" amount of time to give a grieving widow before asking about the sale of a car?

AND by the way, I work where she lives so it could be a casual encounter.

Answer 1

If the car has a for sale sign in it, it would be fine, just remember to be polite.

If it does NOT have a for sale sign on it, dont even think about it.  I would punch you and then slam the door in your face, to be honest.

Answer 2

I think the way I would do it would be to ask her about the car in the front, act like you didn't know it belonged to her husband and just ask if she'd ever consider selling it.  If she brings up that it belonged to her husband, then "I'm so sorry, I didn't realize.  I totally  understand if you're unwilling to sell it."  

Answer 3

August 4th this year? I would think it may appear downright rude to ask about it this soon. If she is back at work already, you could casualy ask about the car and like others said reply you didn't realize it belonged to her husband.  Be prepared for her to want to hang on to his possessions if they hold any sentimental value to her. If they do, I would move on & look elsewhere.

Answer 4

Approach her and tell her your sorry for her loss.  Then tell her if she is interested in selling the car that you know someone who may be interested in it.  At that point she will either say no or say who?

Answer 5

Please don't approach her just yet. She has many details to tend to in addition to grieving.  When she's ready to sell the car, then you can talk to her about it, but approaching her before she makes it known she's ready could really upset her. It's really best to wait for her in her own time.

Hope this helps.

Answer 6

I would say imagine your own time line. Say your mother or someone you loved dearly passed on. How long would you want someone to wait before asking you about selling their things.

I personally would make casual conversation about needing a car. See if SHE mentions it. She might not mention it right away. But she may keep it in mind and mention it later if she really needs the money. It may give her the push she needs to sell it if she is needing money or wants to get rid of it.

I would just say 'have you seen any good used cars for sale around here? I really need a car but can't seem to find any decent ones'. Then let her lead. If she says no then move on and suck it up. If she tells you of hers, make SURE you don't lowball her. Give her more than fair amount. Check the bluebook and see what it is worth and make sure you let her see it as well. As in say oohh your selling yours? Well how much do you want, blah blah. And then in the next couple of days (if she asks too little or doesn't know what to charge) bring her the blue book price or whatever and offer her that amount. Do NOT mess her over.(Not saying you would but no less) She just lost her husband, do not make her regret letting go of his car too.